[ On this island where so little makes sense, there is nothing extraordinary about two rulers of warring nations having a picnic on their balcony; whimsical, perhaps, and even he would not dare deny just how much of their relationship has been based on eccentricity. They were intimate before they were friends again, once married before dating, wore rings as a promise and guarantee they could be together beyond this world; their steps were out of order, their pace didn't always match, but all that matters is that they walk the same path. ]
Beloved.
[ His greeting is as warm as hers, shameless in its affections by nature-- a name that has wasted no time leaving his lips since the day she accepted his feelings. It may be no formal tea party, and honestly there is no need for propriety between the two of them, yet he still claims both her hands to kiss her knuckles, simply because he wants to. ]
These look delectable. Thank you for planning this.
[ Did she sneak bake these while he was away training, or buy them from the café? Either way, he appreciates her thought and effort no less. ]
I must admit you have me curious. To what do we owe such formal invitation?
[ Should Edelgard look over as he takes his seat, she will realize exactly what he means by we: Hugo, oh so comfortably spread across one of the pillows, demanding his own share of treats with a single, languid look. ]
[ She's definitely grown accustomed to certain aspects of their shared lives but she has yet to fully become used to being called "beloved" with such easy warmth and depth of affection. It tumbled from his lips as soon as they entered a relationship but it feels too much like a treasure to seem common.
A little treasure that she gets to enjoy every day, and sometimes multiple times a day.
As her attention strays to Hugo, she laughs. ] I'm afraid the treats meant for smaller felines are still in the kitchen but you have my word that you haven't been forgotten, Hugo.
[ She's certain that he'll hold her to it. For now, though, she turns her eyes back to Dimitri. ]
I hope the request didn't seem too formal. [ She's been making progress on that! But perhaps a bit less progress when the conversation is as important as the one she intends to have over tea today. ] I wanted to make sure I reserved your afternoon.
I bought something else you may like as well. [ She hands him a bag emblazoned with the cafe's name. These aren't set out like the scones because they're meant specifically for him. If he peeks inside he'll see a quartet of small round pastry puffs. ] The attendant called them gougères.
[ Maybe a minor tangent but she doesn't want to make this seem too businesslike. ]
The dough was made with cheese and a cheese filling is piped inside. If you like them perhaps we can try to make them ourselves.
[ They may still be amateurs in the kitchen but once she makes it a project she will master it. ]
[ The smaller feline responds with the flick of one ear and an unconvinced mrow that won't have him budge, while Dimitri is left wondering if the implication here is that he is the bigger feline. Perhaps judging from the way he immediately checks the contents of his gifted bag, one could say he at least has the curiosity to match. ]
Gougères, eh? [ Unable to resist the call of cheese (figurative), he takes a quick pause for a whiff of his treats. ] The smell alone is enticing. We should share them while they are still fresh.
[ Because if there's one thing that's been made clear, it's that she's decided to spoil him. The least he can do is return it in kind. ]
That aside-- [ And speaking of spoiling, he tugs her hand along and urges her to join him on the pillows. It may have to be something of a snug fit, as Hugo refuses to move from his cushiony throne, but hey! Dimitri's lap is largely available, if she would rather claim that. ] --you do realize there is no need for you to reserve my afternoon, do you not? I scarcely have time-sensitive matters to see to, these days.
[ Honestly, most of the time he has to force himself to leave their home, just so they can have any semblance of personal space and individuality. Save for their friend groups -- which are still similar enough, as far as origin goes -- there's very little they can't do together, and he never tires of her company. Training on his own, running a household errand for the both of them, finding a different sparring partner, they're all excuses to give her room to breathe. ]
But, if it was my full attention that you wanted, you have it. Come, let us enjoy our tea before it grows cold.
[ When tugged she goes down willingly, and she doesn't begrudge Hugo the pillow he's claimed. She's compact enough to fit easily between man and cat and she makes sure their tea and scones are positioned in front of them.
She may realize she didn't have to schedule time with him but why risk the disappointment she would feel if either of them had left the apartment and met an accidentally aphrodisiac fate on the very afternoon she was planning to have this conversation. They are wise to many of the island's tricks these days but she would have been unhappy if this hadn't worked out as intended!
But the fact that they're now close enough to lounge on each other, making space for Hugo, highlights that she was thinking of this a bit rigidly, wasn't she? Even in imagining how this might go she pictured herself talking to him over their treats, a layer of formality added. This is better, more natural: they should be touching.
There's still one small mystery remaining by their tea, a very small cloth pouch. She doesn't make any immediate move toward it, now letting her body slant toward Dimitri, her arm resting against his. ]
I enjoy having your full attention.
[ A playful admission of what's surely obvious. It was no less true when they were children than it is now, an evolution of intimacy.
Hugo may be content not to stare right at them from their side but Shadow sits upright on the other side of the balcony door. Under his watchful gaze, she picks up her tea. ]
It occurred to me that I have probably been with you for every birthday you've had here.
[ She's least sure about the timing of the first year, when they were snowed in together. At the time there had been no real community calendar to go by. ]
[ Full attention means full attentions, so Dimitri has yet to notice any such small pouches lying by their tea or anything else of less importance. For now, his eyes are on Edelgard only, her head so close to his shoulder that he could easily lean over and kiss it, if he lacked the self-control.
Then again, he doesn't seriously think she'd mind it too much. Even if she hadn't grown used to his affections in their time together, everything about this arrangement -- from choice of treats and tea and even her admission that barely needed saying -- seems to have been catered to his preferences, spoiled through and through. ]
Ah, my birthday. [ It's this comment that finally clears up the question Dimitri hadn't explicitly voiced. ] Yes, I suppose you have. I could not have asked for better company.
[ Even if that first year may have been as awkward as it was full of... surprises, wasn't it? As he makes for his own teacup, it gives him pause to go over the details of their past years, particularly the months largely established as the closest equivalent to Fodlan's Ethereal Moon. ]
Truthfully, that first year was something of a coincidence with terrible timing. Had it not been for the snowstorm, I hardly think you would have wished to stay so soon after discovering who I was.
[ He doesn't begrudge her, of course, and his easy smile shows no resentment. Yes, it was terrible timing, and yes, the island may have all but forced them to stay together, but the full truth of it is that perhaps they wouldn't have smoothed over their issues as quickly -- or as well -- if they had each gone their separate ways that evening. ]
However, the year following that was quite the opposite. That was... around the time we decided to make our living arrangements permanent, was it not? When we chose to be together.
[ And they have been ever since, in this same modest apartment they could easily have upgraded five times over, yet also chose not to. Comfort without luxury. It's what seems to fit the both of them best.
(Besides, their sex-earned currency has been put to much better use, as the ring peeking out from his open collar will testify.) ]
In any case, I am grateful to have had you by my side. [ Should she face him when he turns, he'll tuck a strand of hair behind her ear. ] Will you be my present this year, as well?
[ Should they be having Folger's coffee instead of tea for this conversation? ]
[ Foolishly, in retrospect. When she saw that there was snow on the ground and snow was still generously falling she shouldn't even have made the attempt. She wasn't prepared for a walk back to those conditions.
But at the time she didn't feel as though she could stay. The situation was fraught.
But body heat and prolonged contact turned those conflicting feelings into a different kind of tension. ]
Last year couldn't have been more different. [ But the question he follows up with startles a very genuine laugh out of her. As he tucks her hair behind her ear, she puts her hand on his upper arm as though trying to pace him. He's outracing her proposal! Her eyes search his face but they're shining with amusement and she partially opens her mouth, thoughts gathering for half a moment before she continues. ] It's my hope that you will be my present this year.
I wondered what one can give the man who has already been her partner in exchanging both rings and daggers. A man resourceful enough to have already sought out a way for us to find each other across worlds when we leave this place.
A man who would no doubt argue that he needs no further gifts because he has my love.
[ Now she reaches for the small pouch and picks it up, holding it between them as she dips her fingers inside to retrieve its contents. She turns her palm up to show him two small heart-shaped lockets, unadorned in decoration, each no bigger than the rings they wear around their respective necks. ]
This year I truly give you my heart.
[ She takes the slightly smaller of the two for herself but offers the other to him. Once he takes it she begins her demonstration: she opens her own locket. It seems empty. She touches her thumb to the left side of the open heart and the charm in his own hand should begin to feel warm. If he opens it and presses the left side in the same way he'll see her face flicker into view on the right as she speaks. ]
When it warms, you will know I'm trying to contact you. I'm assured these little charms should withstand even your strength but I'm afraid the communication is limited. There is no way to input text or leave messages for later review. Still, this will allow us to better plan our visits when the time comes.
[ Or simply speak to each other across the distance, a thought she takes comfort in. ]
[ His brows rise when she says he should be her gift this year, a thought all the more amusing when they're allegedly celebrating his birthday, but that look and a smile are all he offers in the way of a response; she seems to have something in mind here, so he lets her carry on without further interruptions.
(Somehow, he doesn't even protest the thought of getting a present at all, but only because she does make his point in advance: he has her love, and thus he needs little else.)
Once the lockets come into view, he peeks at them with some curiosity, holding out his palm to accept his. He thinks they may be plain matching accessories, perhaps with their names engraved, but the demonstration leaves him with a look not so different from that adorning his face whenever she would show him her little magic tricks, all those years in their past, his lips half parted with a breath caught in his throat, charmed beyond words. ]
El, that is ingenious. [ His own eyes flicker between the image of Edelgard mirrored on the right side of his locket and the real face by his side; though much smaller in size, this reflection is as faithful as those video calls they have grown used to. ] Frankly, the Augur's powers often astound me, but this much is a grateful surprise.
[ He is grateful to her, as well-- for the gift, the thought she put into it, the heart she willingly gives him. Even grateful that, right now, he doesn't have to settle for her likeness and voice only, that he cup her face in his hand and claim a kiss from her lips, the taste more vivid than a memory will ever be. ]
Thank you, my beloved. I shall keep it with me always, so you will never be kept waiting.
[ He contemplates the locket one more time before pressing it closed, and makes a mental note to hang it from the same necklace where he keeps his ring: on his person at all times, as safe as his very life can be. ]
I imagine these must have made for a costly exchange, though. Are you quite certain we can still afford this tea?
[ It's said with a light breath and a content lilt in his tone, a comment made in jest... for the most part. Should she wish to build their fuckbucks back up, now would be as good a time as ever. ]
[ She really couldn't expect him to be displeased after he personally asked the Augur for a way for them to continue seeing each other after they're expelled. All the same, the pleasure in his face brings more to her own.
And his question makes a small laugh escape under her breath. ]
Let us simply say that we should not break any furniture over the next few weeks.
[ It's teasing but also not inaccurate! It had been some time since she received a specific reward for her -- largely their -- sexual effort and now she must start anew. ]
Not even if we have something to celebrate. [ One of her hands moves to cover his. Though she didn't blush at all during her demonstration, this part does cause a slight twinge of heat in her cheeks. ] Because it is my intention for you to wear this as my husband.
[ She pauses for a fraction of a moment, then makes an addition just in case he needs to hear it as clearly as possible. ]
You will marry me, won't you? [ He's said that he already thinks of her as his wife and he was willing to marry her before that, as evidenced by his (unnecessary and unfortunate!) anonymous network post years ago, but it doesn't feel right not to phrase this as a question. One that he can choose to accept. They are the architects of their own romance and she wouldn't have it any other way. ] I want neither of us to be kept waiting.
[ His own quiet laugh mirrors hers, her response having multiple layers of meaning to him. He remembers having his card all but cleared out when he made a similar request of the Augur, but mostly he knows it is usually him causing property damage, so he makes another mental note to be extra careful in whatever celebratory enthusiasm will result from this tea.
Or he could try to, but her following words give him the impression his birthday is hardly the main event for today. Slowly, the arch of his eyebrows softens, and realization settles upon the curve of his lips. ]
You have always been far less patient than I.
[ His tease is both fond and nostalgic in equal measure, but no less true for it. When the tempo of his step-step-turn wouldn't match hers, when she marched on ahead and threatened to leave him behind -- as a child, at war, in life -- she was never one to be kept waiting, and so it fell squarely upon his shoulders, the task to rise up and meet her. But Dimitri's own stride could outpace hers, seeing friendship when she would call him no more than ally, reaching beyond the limits of formal agreements to feelings she failed to recognize, giving all of his heart when two worlds still kept them apart; he, too, has been made to wait.
Today, she finally catches up to him. ]
Of course I will marry you, El. [ He leans in to press his forehead to hers, reinforcing an answer that needed no giving. ] But perhaps I should ask you that question in another day or two. I would hate for this topic to become reason for contention between us yet again.
[ He doesn't really think she's under an influence this time, but hey-- never let it be said he didn't learn his lesson!! ]
[ Ultimately it's selfish, even though she is only taking -- finally -- what has been offered. At first she didn't know how to allow herself to be happy with her work left so unfinished at home, waiting for her.
Then she was willing to taste happiness and claim it but within certain bounds because this particular indulgence only existed here and it needed to be decidedly their own uninfluenced decisions steering their actions.
Now, with measures in place to mitigate the ache of a potential separation, who benefits from them not doing exactly as they please on their own terms? Certainly not her. She cannot dig her heels in so hard that she doesn't make the most of their time together. She closes their eyes as their foreheads touch. ]
Shall we argue about it on the network? [ It's not said without an undercurrent of amusement in her voice. ] We can ask those dear to us to hear our vows and perhaps even celebrate with a small feast. There will be no doubt in your mind -- or anyone else's -- that we are married by the time you and I take our leave.
[ Her hand leaves his but only so she can palm his cheek instead. ]
You will be my husband-- [ There is no strange magic behind this and that's precisely what makes putting it into words right now seem magical to her. ] --and I will be your wife. Irrevocably my Dimitri.
[ For once, it is a gesture that comes easier to him: laughter at the mention of an argument on the network, a smile at the prospect of a small wedding, his face unabashedly leaning into her touch like he could never have enough. But as long-winded as he could be, as vocal as he was about showering others in heartfelt sentiment, right now, he finds that words fail him when he needs them most.
Or perhaps he doesn't, not really. Perhaps this power to render him speechless is just one of the many ways in which they are such a good match for each other. ]
I am yours. [ A minor correction. He is no husband yet, but he is certainly hers. ] This much, I can say without interference.
[ So it is another reference, in a way, a throwback line to a time that was once reason for awkward silences and palpable embarrassment far beyond what a pair of feline ears and tails could feasibly cause. One that he also made when she caught on to his feelings in a pool of flower petals, back when a thoughtless proposal rolled off his tongue and hung between them, something to grab on to when he couldn't find his footing. A crutch he has no need of anymore, but no less true for it.
But it does evoke a memory, and he takes a hand to the ring dangling from his necklace. Again and again, it is imbued with new meaning. ]
When first we exchanged these, I was mostly under an influence. [ Mostly, as he never again has to hide the extent of his then conflicted feelings for her. ] Once that was over, I was prepared to honor the vows I made to you, as I believed that to be the right course of action. But what I say now is not bound by duty.
[ The pause he takes is only an excuse to cup her face again again, no need to force his memory and dig for his exact words; for better or worse, he never forgets what he holds important. ]
For every day you wear this ring, I hope you will remember that you are not alone. My blade, my strength and my love are yours, and no matter when or where, my heart will always be with you.
Perhaps it should not seem like such a strange and marvelous thought because surely he would not ever have pursued this if she didn't and this past year of shared lives and living space, shared beds and bodies, has never not seemed happy to her. Yet this occasion makes her think it distinctly -- she has made him happy -- and feel as though the thought should be held up to catch the light, a gem of choice cut and clarity.
What wells in her chest is giddy. Here her title has always meant little but she has rarely felt more a young woman and less an emperor, a mask, a tool than she does in this moment, with her most loved pressing his face to her hand like the biggest cat of all. When he cups her face again she meets his eyes without reservation, sinks into the moment like it's satin-covered, and fortunately this time it's only a twinge of heat in her cheeks. He makes her happy. It's no longer a surprise -- it hasn't been for some time now -- but she likes the way it feels. ]
You are burned into my memory, Dimitri. I will wear you near my heart, only a touch away.
[ Burned into her memory, she says, yet it is his heart that melts-- under her touch, around her words, spills over her sentiment. So full with incomparable joy, the kind he once thought he would never know, the kind he learned to wait for ever since entering a relationship with her.
(It hasn't always been easy to match the tempo of their steps, not as children, and perhaps even less so as adults. Today, they are the perfect match for each other's song and dance.) ]
I could not think of a better place to call my home.
[ Speaking of which, the ring that dangles near his heart is a reminder, and he steals another glance at the pendants Edelgard has traded for. They are known to get carried away in their affections every so often, so perhaps it would be wise to make sure they are, indeed, wearing this means of communication they have just secured before the unpredictable strikes. ]
What say you, beloved? [ His free hand makes for his necklace again. ] Shall we add these pendants to the rings on our necklaces?
[ Or they could find a different place to wear their rings, maybe. He wouldn't mind that. ]
[ His home. It's quite a statement from a proud Faerghan.
And to her, after years of wrestling with her home being the place that houses her most unhappy memories, it's kind of a breath-taking thought. She has thought of her home in larger terms -- Enbarr, Adrestia, Fodlan -- and in her entire time here she has been resistant to the idea of thinking of this place as home.
But Dimitri? Her Dimitri? He makes an excellent home.
Ignore her soft eyes and the visible warmth in her cheeks. She's nodding her agreement! ]
The sooner the better.
[ But just a moment. Just one: she wants to lean her face up to his and give him the sweetest of brief kisses first, her joy threatening to spill out in the form of laughter. With that, she reaches to undo the clasp behind her neck. ]
I suppose it's possible that we will need to explain these necklaces to someone one day.
[ Ignore her soft eyes and warmth? Oh, no, much the contrary-- he thinks he would rather indulge in it. As much as he admires her strength and fighting spirit, even her sheer stubbornness at times, there is no denying that this is how he loves her the most: soft, delicate, safe in the knowledge that she will never have to shoulder her burdens on her own again. Happy.
(Maybe one day they can do nothing but indulge, together in a home of their choosing, free to dance until no sunset could pull them apart. But in the meantime, he takes her kiss, a gift so great he can never take for granted.) ]
To quite a few people, I am afraid. [ And though it's not a comfortable prospect by any means, he still manages to say it with an airy breath and a smile. ] And they will no doubt question the truth in our claims, every bit as much as the thought of marrying an enemy of war. That is, provided there still is a war to return to...
[ Perhaps he oughtn't be so distracted when his brute fingers engage with delicate work like unclasping his own necklace, but his mind wanders anyway. They have had reason to believe time stands still back in their own worlds, but does it truly? Does he even want it to be? He was once prepared to face the Edelgard back home until one of them no longer drew breath, but that thought has grown exponentially harder now that her face means so much more to him than just the memory of a dear childhood sweetheart. And if Byleth's accounts turn out to be the future that awaits him, then would he look at her transformed visage and see a grotesque creature unworthy of compassion... or a beloved monster instead?
He sighs, chest swelling with the depth of his feelings and sinking with the weight of his troubles. Their happiness is as selfish as is his wish that this moment would not be sullied; again they are matched, sin for sin, monster for monster. ]
Be it as it may, my choice has long since been made. [ And the silver chains coming undone from around his neck are just another reminder, metal pooling over metal at the center of a large open palm. ] I swore I would follow my heart, and it has led me back to you, time and time again. Whatever challenges await ahead, I trust that we shall see it through.
[ Time and time again, his hand reaches for her; right now, with an offer, a promise, a ring that dangles from a necklace like his heart from her fingertips. ]
[ She eyes him curiously. Dimitri has been less inclined toward creative half-truths and necessary lies their entire time here, although he seemed to work with her demands to the best of his ability when they initially made their agreement.
(She'd be lying if she claimed there wasn't some odd and unmentionable thrill in those secret meetings and conflicted feelings but how could she possibly have expected to end up here, asking Dimitri to marry her in front of their friends. Knowing he has considered himself that committed and in love for some time already. Happier and less alone than she has ever felt.
She supposes he has always had a talent for making her feel that way.) ]
You think you would tell the truth as soon as someone noticed it?
[ Hold on. His acknowledgement that his heart has lead him back to her time and time again, his certainty that they will rise to any challenge ahead... she can practically feel the pleasure churning through her brain. Once her pendant is safely around her neck, the chain clasped, her hand meets his again.
The next step -- besides marriage -- may be finding ways to make this wild story more... accessible to their nearest and dearest at home. Not everyone needs to know, of course, but she has every expectation that Hubert will pick up on subtle differences, even if she does her best to hide the chain around her neck. Would Dedue be as observant? ]
I think a great many people may doubt our sanity before we even reach the part about marrying the enemy. [ Which isn't to say that she disagrees with his certainty. Though her touch lingers, she slides his necklace out of his palm. ] I suppose that our means of communication could serve as proof of our claims-- [ Since she has experienced nothing quite like it at home. ] --but I must look just like the Edelgard you left behind.
[ Her question gives him pause, and her following statement almost fills in for an answer of his own. Not for nothing, questioning Dimitri's sanity should be par for the course for the friends who witnessed it all: his ghosts, his rage, his bloodlust for Edelgard later matched by his iron will to understand her. He doesn't expect any different from them, really, could never begrudge then for raised eyebrows and vocal protests.
Still, he wants them to know the truth always, wants to hide nothing else from those he deems dearest. It is what they deserve, and what gives him any measure of peace. ]
Perhaps... not as soon as someone noticed, no. [ Because Dedue? That man can probably tell from a mile away that someone ate the weedelgard, and Dimitri doubts he could keep it from him. ] For one, and provided I do return to the exact time and place as I was before coming to the island, then I would be speaking of my love for the Emperor as we march on the imperial capital. Frankly, that is not something I would wish to do.
[ And surely she can understand why. As much as they know their counterparts are different people, at the same time... they are not. They are the same in face, name, soul, even in shared history; at the end of his long road, he will have to challenge the Edelgard who is, in so many ways, the same as the woman he loves. ]
I suppose I would start with a compromise. A way to both reassure them I will not stray from my path, and reinforce my resolve to reach out to Edelgard to the very last. There is not much else I should say until the war's conclusion, but when that time comes...
[ Well. That will heavily depend on how the war concludes, and whether or not both he and that Edelgard come out alive. That would be the most favorable outcome, but what would it mean for her? Another lifetime in prison, her closest friends gone? Death might be kinder, but he's selfish.
With his own necklace in her hands, he reaches for her pendant, thumb idly running across the small metal surface. A thought flashes across his mind, just an impulse. ]
If she is alive when the war is over-- [ His eyebrows furrow, as though he has yet to digest his own train of thoughts. ] Do you think... she would listen to you?
[ There is certainly a lot left undefined about their return. They have no proof that they will return to where and when they were before arriving here on the island. She has chosen to think she will because nothing else has seemed acceptable.
But it is difficult to imagine.
She threads his necklace through the small loop on his pendant, her expression thoughtful. Would she listen to herself? Her eyes stray to his face for a moment, then down at his large fingers on her own pendant. She has to be honest, as dissatisfying as the answer is: ]
I'm not certain. If the attempt is made after everything plays out as Byleth described, perhaps not.
[ It depends on how it is handled, she supposes, but if she has lost everything, if she has fought him in the palace and been defeated, if her allies are dead or scattered, if she has transformed... ]
There was no-- [ She pauses slightly, as though gathering her thoughts. ] --room in Byleth's account for personal details about her. [ This isn't even particularly Byleth's fault; it seems there wasn't exactly time for in-depth discussion with her counterpart. ] Such as whether the transformation had any affect on her [ my ] mind. Regardless, I think hearing me speak more or less as your ally could simply be a betrayal at that point.
[ What a shame that she thinks herself unlikely to grant a second parley so soon. Not even to the boy who kept her from losing her heart in the most difficult time of her life. Her eyes meet his again and she offers a tight smile. ]
I'm sure you now understand why trust would be so difficult for her to measure out but imagine learning that you are one of multiple versions of yourself and you may be the least fortunate. Worse, you have only learned this when you are no longer in a position for another Dimitri's knowledge to be of actionable benefit.
I am not unwilling to speak to her. On the contrary, I wonder if there is anyone better equipped to deal with our counterparts than ourselves and I think we should consider this further. Even so, it would be hard for her to give weight to what I say.
[ The longer she speaks, the more he deflates, his chest a large balloon that has been squeezed out of air-- or hope. Perhaps he truly is too naïve, to have expected any different. ]
I appreciate your honesty. [ This much, he can say in earnest. ] In all truth, it is as I suspected: she may be beyond my reach at this point, and the Professor's accounts only reinforced that thought. But I--
[ The breath he expels is something of a groan, a shake of his head marking his frustration. There are so many ways for him to finish that sentence: that he should have reached for her sooner, that he doesn't want to lose anyone else, that he still cares about her against all odds, that he wishes to save her though it may not be his place to. Would it bother this Edelgard -- his El -- to hear of his depth of feeling for her counterpart? He doesn't think her given to jealousy, but this is a very unique circumstance they find themselves in.
But his El is not beyond his reach, and so reach he does, his palm moving up from her pendant to cup her cheek, thumb stroking skin. No matter how far his thoughts stray, he would be hard pressed to look at that face and not feel a smile spring up in his. ]
You are my one and only beloved. But whether out of fondness for the little girl who was once my dearest, or the feelings I have for the woman standing before me... Across infinite timelines, I know there is no Edelgard von Hresvelg whose smile I would not love to see.
[ As long as they carry even a small fraction of the El he befriended or the El he came to love, so too will they carry a piece of his heart. Going forward, it is only fair that his wife should know. ]
My apologies, I did not mean to sour such momentous occasion. I know that she would call me foolish for it.
[ Is this one of the many ways in which his El and her counterpart are the same, or is this where they differ? He's still waiting on a verdict. ]
[ Dimitri has a large soft heart and learning just how large and soft has been a pleasant surprise after the tales she has heard of his counterpart's stormier nature. That Dimitri will not look at her like this when they meet again, nor would he speak of her so fondly. Again her cheeks warm. She can complain all she wants about this place -- and she will -- but it has been remarkable to have been given a chance to communicate in a way they would not have otherwise.
Leave out the manipulated intimacy and the fact that they didn't choose to come here and much about their story is...
Well, surprisingly romantic. The romance she once told both Dorothea and, more recently, Dimitri himself that she expected to never have. That much she is grateful for. To know love, and more specifically his love. ]
Dimitri--
[ His large soft heart is not foolish on its own. There have been times when she painted him with broad strokes, thinking his heart was too soft or he was too attached to the Church or he was incapable of action when it was needed, and she doesn't think she has always been wrong when judging him but their lives are complications upon complications and she has had a chance to learn his shades of gray by now. ]
--I am not certain that I ever felt particularly special before I met you. Do you know that? I was not by nature an unhappy child but I was one of many and sometimes felt it. I was my father's daughter or someone's sister.
[ And then the experimentation she endured made her a type of special she would not ever have wanted, but that isn't the point she wants to make. The point is that knowing there is so much affection for her in that large soft heart of his still sometimes takes her by surprise. The fact that they can never be those children again doesn't actually detract from the fact that they were those children.
And many of the things she wanted as a child she still wants now.
With a hint of something like pride, she leans in to return his necklace to his rightful place. Not without a small kiss to the side of his face. ]
You have not soured our occasion. I'm pleased that we can speak about difficult subjects and work together to lessen the bloodshed in our future.
[ Combining their strength, one might say. Once the necklace is clasped behind his neck, she frames his face with her hands. ]
I would like for my counterpart to live and see her goals achieved and have a taste of personal happiness. If she cannot see her way past a cell of course she will not go along willingly. But perhaps there is a way to tell her what you know and find a goal that can be worked toward together. Byleth's past does not have to be your future. We will write that ourselves.
[ When she begins to speak again, Dimitri listens with a squint in his eyes and an incredulous tug in his lips. It's true he can't imagine what it must be like to be just one of many -- he has only ever been an only child, the sole heir to the throne, the last of his name -- but to think he made her feel special, even in their childhood? It would be hard to pinpoint whatever he did to accomplish such a feat, as obvious as his puerile affections may have been at the time.
But these days? He can see how she would be made to feel special-- because he actively tries, because she has always been a special presence in his life, through highs and lows. Perhaps she'll never quite understand the full depth of his feelings for her, because she never quite witnessed how deep his hatred ran, but what he told her several months ago remains true. And what else is there to say of a man who loves her more than his once only reason to keep breathing? ]
I can only trust that we will, my beloved. [ He has to, lest that large soft heart of his will shatter. ] And right here and now, between your warm hands, I do. This bright future that you have envisioned... may it be intertwined with mine forevermore.
[ The details of which can be discussed at length and planned for at a later moment, because right now? All he wants is to close his eyes and lean into her touch, her hands dwarfed under his, the curve of his chest swelling and deflating with each deep breath. For all that his mind sometimes will race with affliction for the lives and fates that are beyond his reach, she can calm the tempest every bit as well as she could once cast it.
The breath he exhales is short and bittersweet. ]
It is somewhat of an ironic thought, is it not?
[ Does he intend to leave her in the shadows? Of course not. The pause he takes is only so he can see her again, a gentle brush of his knuckles treating her cheek. ]
You, who would once see yourself as though being no more than your war, and I, a man who is only good for war. Perhaps that is why only you can make me feel at such peace.
[ If Edelgard is her war, then in her Dimitri has found his Somewhere to Belong. ]
[ Special, much like now. But how could she feel any other way when he chooses her? Despite everything from the past he shares with another Edelgard to the blood shed during the war to the difficulties in courting her on this very island, he chooses her. Once it meant everything to be chosen -- believed in -- by their Professor; it means even more to her now.
When he leans into her touch, she welcomes it like she could roll herself in his affection and be buoyant for the rest of her days. She has spent too much time heavy with dire purpose. ]
You are not only good for war. In fact, you have proven yourself capable of building bridges.
[ Still, what he says isn't lost on her. There is a certain odd balance in it, and more importantly she is glad to know that she brings him peace. ]
But I will take you all the same. [ Urging his hand toward her lips, she kisses his open palm and then folds his fingers as though to trap that affection in place. ] Together we may even be good for love.
[ The words sound a bit strange to her own ears. They aren't grounded in any grim practicality; he rekindles her hope. ]
There is something else I'd like for us to do but I think it should wait until the weather clears. [ The snow may not be cold but by the end of a walk they could be covered in it. ] Perhaps later tonight.
[ Capable of building bridges, huh? There is some truth to it, but only in the same extent to which he had outside help: alliances forged out of necessity, secrets never meant to be spilled out, a much greater picture he wouldn't otherwise be able to see in full. The will to find a more peaceful resolution to their conflict had always been there, but without these influential forces, would he truly be able to do it on his lonesome?
Ah, what a silly thought. He just made a vow that Edelgard would never be alone again; that also means neither will he. ]
That may be something else we have learned together.
[ And he will treasure every bit of it, the affection she places right at the center of his palm and that he holds on to with all of his strength-- and his closed fist even draws Hugo's attention for a moment, his little snout trying to sniff out the promise of a hidden snack, but alas, this particular kind of treat is only meant for the larger feline in the room. ]
Ah, you are full of surprises today, eh? [ After a moment's pause for some brief ear scratches -- what a heinous crime it would be, to deny his cat some of his own affection -- Dimitri turns to Edelgard again, his full attention freely given. ] What is it that you would like to do? An evening stroll if you cannot fall asleep?
[ However long it has been since their days of sporadic evening walks and late night messages, already it feels like a lifetime ago. ]
[ She smiles, sincere but not without self-awareness. ]
I think I'm still learning.
[ Obviously falling in love with Dimitri has been... a process, though in some ways it has been easier than one might expect, helped along significantly by their forced separation from the war and the utter absence of those who slither in the dark. It will still be a challenge to build bridges whenever she returns.
But Hugo's curious sniffing makes her let out a small laugh. The hand she holds out to him is also sadly empty but beckoning with a promise of scratches. There are no felines in this apartment who don't like that! ]
What I had in mind was an evening stroll before we even consider sleep.
[ A walk together is something they could do at any time but there's a specific purpose driving this! Timing is important. ]
[ Her attention to Hugo never fails to earn a smile from him, but it's her plan reveal that actually has him breathing out a laugh. Even though they're celebrating his birthday, there is very little he could deny her, least of all today, yet her request is so... simple. Something they could do -- and have done -- any other day. He's hardly the type to complain, of course, and it's true their options around the island are still somewhat limited, but it is still a bit odd. ]
Is that truly all you had in mind? [ A good-humored lilt lingers in his voice, but he does narrow his eyes in curious suspicion. ] I would not object, far from it, but I reckon there is no need for such formality over a simple evening stroll together.
[ Well. Admittedly she is still a fair bit formal without any real need for it, much like she was about their teatime in the balcony; he now understands she had grander plans to unfold, and perhaps that is why he expects something more of their promised walk. ]
Be it as it may, know that you may ask whatever you wish of me. As long as it is in my power, you every whim will be met today.
[ It's only fair, isn't it? She's just given him everything he could ask for. ]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
that's very reasonably good
Beloved.
[ His greeting is as warm as hers, shameless in its affections by nature-- a name that has wasted no time leaving his lips since the day she accepted his feelings. It may be no formal tea party, and honestly there is no need for propriety between the two of them, yet he still claims both her hands to kiss her knuckles, simply because he wants to. ]
These look delectable. Thank you for planning this.
[ Did she sneak bake these while he was away training, or buy them from the café? Either way, he appreciates her thought and effort no less. ]
I must admit you have me curious. To what do we owe such formal invitation?
[ Should Edelgard look over as he takes his seat, she will realize exactly what he means by we: Hugo, oh so comfortably spread across one of the pillows, demanding his own share of treats with a single, languid look. ]
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A little treasure that she gets to enjoy every day, and sometimes multiple times a day.
As her attention strays to Hugo, she laughs. ] I'm afraid the treats meant for smaller felines are still in the kitchen but you have my word that you haven't been forgotten, Hugo.
[ She's certain that he'll hold her to it. For now, though, she turns her eyes back to Dimitri. ]
I hope the request didn't seem too formal. [ She's been making progress on that! But perhaps a bit less progress when the conversation is as important as the one she intends to have over tea today. ] I wanted to make sure I reserved your afternoon.
I bought something else you may like as well. [ She hands him a bag emblazoned with the cafe's name. These aren't set out like the scones because they're meant specifically for him. If he peeks inside he'll see a quartet of small round pastry puffs. ] The attendant called them gougères.
[ Maybe a minor tangent but she doesn't want to make this seem too businesslike. ]
The dough was made with cheese and a cheese filling is piped inside. If you like them perhaps we can try to make them ourselves.
[ They may still be amateurs in the kitchen but once she makes it a project she will master it. ]
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Gougères, eh? [ Unable to resist the call of cheese (figurative), he takes a quick pause for a whiff of his treats. ] The smell alone is enticing. We should share them while they are still fresh.
[ Because if there's one thing that's been made clear, it's that she's decided to spoil him. The least he can do is return it in kind. ]
That aside-- [ And speaking of spoiling, he tugs her hand along and urges her to join him on the pillows. It may have to be something of a snug fit, as Hugo refuses to move from his cushiony throne, but hey! Dimitri's lap is largely available, if she would rather claim that. ] --you do realize there is no need for you to reserve my afternoon, do you not? I scarcely have time-sensitive matters to see to, these days.
[ Honestly, most of the time he has to force himself to leave their home, just so they can have any semblance of personal space and individuality. Save for their friend groups -- which are still similar enough, as far as origin goes -- there's very little they can't do together, and he never tires of her company. Training on his own, running a household errand for the both of them, finding a different sparring partner, they're all excuses to give her room to breathe. ]
But, if it was my full attention that you wanted, you have it. Come, let us enjoy our tea before it grows cold.
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She may realize she didn't have to schedule time with him but why risk the disappointment she would feel if either of them had left the apartment and met an accidentally aphrodisiac fate on the very afternoon she was planning to have this conversation. They are wise to many of the island's tricks these days but she would have been unhappy if this hadn't worked out as intended!
But the fact that they're now close enough to lounge on each other, making space for Hugo, highlights that she was thinking of this a bit rigidly, wasn't she? Even in imagining how this might go she pictured herself talking to him over their treats, a layer of formality added. This is better, more natural: they should be touching.
There's still one small mystery remaining by their tea, a very small cloth pouch. She doesn't make any immediate move toward it, now letting her body slant toward Dimitri, her arm resting against his. ]
I enjoy having your full attention.
[ A playful admission of what's surely obvious. It was no less true when they were children than it is now, an evolution of intimacy.
Hugo may be content not to stare right at them from their side but Shadow sits upright on the other side of the balcony door. Under his watchful gaze, she picks up her tea. ]
It occurred to me that I have probably been with you for every birthday you've had here.
[ She's least sure about the timing of the first year, when they were snowed in together. At the time there had been no real community calendar to go by. ]
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Then again, he doesn't seriously think she'd mind it too much. Even if she hadn't grown used to his affections in their time together, everything about this arrangement -- from choice of treats and tea and even her admission that barely needed saying -- seems to have been catered to his preferences, spoiled through and through. ]
Ah, my birthday. [ It's this comment that finally clears up the question Dimitri hadn't explicitly voiced. ] Yes, I suppose you have. I could not have asked for better company.
[ Even if that first year may have been as awkward as it was full of... surprises, wasn't it? As he makes for his own teacup, it gives him pause to go over the details of their past years, particularly the months largely established as the closest equivalent to Fodlan's Ethereal Moon. ]
Truthfully, that first year was something of a coincidence with terrible timing. Had it not been for the snowstorm, I hardly think you would have wished to stay so soon after discovering who I was.
[ He doesn't begrudge her, of course, and his easy smile shows no resentment. Yes, it was terrible timing, and yes, the island may have all but forced them to stay together, but the full truth of it is that perhaps they wouldn't have smoothed over their issues as quickly -- or as well -- if they had each gone their separate ways that evening. ]
However, the year following that was quite the opposite. That was... around the time we decided to make our living arrangements permanent, was it not? When we chose to be together.
[ And they have been ever since, in this same modest apartment they could easily have upgraded five times over, yet also chose not to. Comfort without luxury. It's what seems to fit the both of them best.
(Besides, their sex-earned currency has been put to much better use, as the ring peeking out from his open collar will testify.) ]
In any case, I am grateful to have had you by my side. [ Should she face him when he turns, he'll tuck a strand of hair behind her ear. ] Will you be my present this year, as well?
[ Should they be having Folger's coffee instead of tea for this conversation? ]
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[ Foolishly, in retrospect. When she saw that there was snow on the ground and snow was still generously falling she shouldn't even have made the attempt. She wasn't prepared for a walk back to those conditions.
But at the time she didn't feel as though she could stay. The situation was fraught.
But body heat and prolonged contact turned those conflicting feelings into a different kind of tension. ]
Last year couldn't have been more different. [ But the question he follows up with startles a very genuine laugh out of her. As he tucks her hair behind her ear, she puts her hand on his upper arm as though trying to pace him. He's outracing her proposal! Her eyes search his face but they're shining with amusement and she partially opens her mouth, thoughts gathering for half a moment before she continues. ] It's my hope that you will be my present this year.
I wondered what one can give the man who has already been her partner in exchanging both rings and daggers. A man resourceful enough to have already sought out a way for us to find each other across worlds when we leave this place.
A man who would no doubt argue that he needs no further gifts because he has my love.
[ Now she reaches for the small pouch and picks it up, holding it between them as she dips her fingers inside to retrieve its contents. She turns her palm up to show him two small heart-shaped lockets, unadorned in decoration, each no bigger than the rings they wear around their respective necks. ]
This year I truly give you my heart.
[ She takes the slightly smaller of the two for herself but offers the other to him. Once he takes it she begins her demonstration: she opens her own locket. It seems empty. She touches her thumb to the left side of the open heart and the charm in his own hand should begin to feel warm. If he opens it and presses the left side in the same way he'll see her face flicker into view on the right as she speaks. ]
When it warms, you will know I'm trying to contact you. I'm assured these little charms should withstand even your strength but I'm afraid the communication is limited. There is no way to input text or leave messages for later review. Still, this will allow us to better plan our visits when the time comes.
[ Or simply speak to each other across the distance, a thought she takes comfort in. ]
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(Somehow, he doesn't even protest the thought of getting a present at all, but only because she does make his point in advance: he has her love, and thus he needs little else.)
Once the lockets come into view, he peeks at them with some curiosity, holding out his palm to accept his. He thinks they may be plain matching accessories, perhaps with their names engraved, but the demonstration leaves him with a look not so different from that adorning his face whenever she would show him her little magic tricks, all those years in their past, his lips half parted with a breath caught in his throat, charmed beyond words. ]
El, that is ingenious. [ His own eyes flicker between the image of Edelgard mirrored on the right side of his locket and the real face by his side; though much smaller in size, this reflection is as faithful as those video calls they have grown used to. ] Frankly, the Augur's powers often astound me, but this much is a grateful surprise.
[ He is grateful to her, as well-- for the gift, the thought she put into it, the heart she willingly gives him. Even grateful that, right now, he doesn't have to settle for her likeness and voice only, that he cup her face in his hand and claim a kiss from her lips, the taste more vivid than a memory will ever be. ]
Thank you, my beloved. I shall keep it with me always, so you will never be kept waiting.
[ He contemplates the locket one more time before pressing it closed, and makes a mental note to hang it from the same necklace where he keeps his ring: on his person at all times, as safe as his very life can be. ]
I imagine these must have made for a costly exchange, though. Are you quite certain we can still afford this tea?
[ It's said with a light breath and a content lilt in his tone, a comment made in jest... for the most part. Should she wish to build their fuckbucks back up, now would be as good a time as ever. ]
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And his question makes a small laugh escape under her breath. ]
Let us simply say that we should not break any furniture over the next few weeks.
[ It's teasing but also not inaccurate! It had been some time since she received a specific reward for her -- largely their -- sexual effort and now she must start anew. ]
Not even if we have something to celebrate. [ One of her hands moves to cover his. Though she didn't blush at all during her demonstration, this part does cause a slight twinge of heat in her cheeks. ] Because it is my intention for you to wear this as my husband.
[ She pauses for a fraction of a moment, then makes an addition just in case he needs to hear it as clearly as possible. ]
You will marry me, won't you? [ He's said that he already thinks of her as his wife and he was willing to marry her before that, as evidenced by his (unnecessary and unfortunate!) anonymous network post years ago, but it doesn't feel right not to phrase this as a question. One that he can choose to accept. They are the architects of their own romance and she wouldn't have it any other way. ] I want neither of us to be kept waiting.
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Or he could try to, but her following words give him the impression his birthday is hardly the main event for today. Slowly, the arch of his eyebrows softens, and realization settles upon the curve of his lips. ]
You have always been far less patient than I.
[ His tease is both fond and nostalgic in equal measure, but no less true for it. When the tempo of his step-step-turn wouldn't match hers, when she marched on ahead and threatened to leave him behind -- as a child, at war, in life -- she was never one to be kept waiting, and so it fell squarely upon his shoulders, the task to rise up and meet her. But Dimitri's own stride could outpace hers, seeing friendship when she would call him no more than ally, reaching beyond the limits of formal agreements to feelings she failed to recognize, giving all of his heart when two worlds still kept them apart; he, too, has been made to wait.
Today, she finally catches up to him. ]
Of course I will marry you, El. [ He leans in to press his forehead to hers, reinforcing an answer that needed no giving. ] But perhaps I should ask you that question in another day or two. I would hate for this topic to become reason for contention between us yet again.
[ He doesn't really think she's under an influence this time, but hey-- never let it be said he didn't learn his lesson!! ]
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Then she was willing to taste happiness and claim it but within certain bounds because this particular indulgence only existed here and it needed to be decidedly their own uninfluenced decisions steering their actions.
Now, with measures in place to mitigate the ache of a potential separation, who benefits from them not doing exactly as they please on their own terms? Certainly not her. She cannot dig her heels in so hard that she doesn't make the most of their time together. She closes their eyes as their foreheads touch. ]
Shall we argue about it on the network? [ It's not said without an undercurrent of amusement in her voice. ] We can ask those dear to us to hear our vows and perhaps even celebrate with a small feast. There will be no doubt in your mind -- or anyone else's -- that we are married by the time you and I take our leave.
[ Her hand leaves his but only so she can palm his cheek instead. ]
You will be my husband-- [ There is no strange magic behind this and that's precisely what makes putting it into words right now seem magical to her. ] --and I will be your wife. Irrevocably my Dimitri.
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Or perhaps he doesn't, not really. Perhaps this power to render him speechless is just one of the many ways in which they are such a good match for each other. ]
I am yours. [ A minor correction. He is no husband yet, but he is certainly hers. ] This much, I can say without interference.
[ So it is another reference, in a way, a throwback line to a time that was once reason for awkward silences and palpable embarrassment far beyond what a pair of feline ears and tails could feasibly cause. One that he also made when she caught on to his feelings in a pool of flower petals, back when a thoughtless proposal rolled off his tongue and hung between them, something to grab on to when he couldn't find his footing. A crutch he has no need of anymore, but no less true for it.
But it does evoke a memory, and he takes a hand to the ring dangling from his necklace. Again and again, it is imbued with new meaning. ]
When first we exchanged these, I was mostly under an influence. [ Mostly, as he never again has to hide the extent of his then conflicted feelings for her. ] Once that was over, I was prepared to honor the vows I made to you, as I believed that to be the right course of action. But what I say now is not bound by duty.
[ The pause he takes is only an excuse to cup her face again again, no need to force his memory and dig for his exact words; for better or worse, he never forgets what he holds important. ]
For every day you wear this ring, I hope you will remember that you are not alone. My blade, my strength and my love are yours, and no matter when or where, my heart will always be with you.
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Perhaps it should not seem like such a strange and marvelous thought because surely he would not ever have pursued this if she didn't and this past year of shared lives and living space, shared beds and bodies, has never not seemed happy to her. Yet this occasion makes her think it distinctly -- she has made him happy -- and feel as though the thought should be held up to catch the light, a gem of choice cut and clarity.
What wells in her chest is giddy. Here her title has always meant little but she has rarely felt more a young woman and less an emperor, a mask, a tool than she does in this moment, with her most loved pressing his face to her hand like the biggest cat of all. When he cups her face again she meets his eyes without reservation, sinks into the moment like it's satin-covered, and fortunately this time it's only a twinge of heat in her cheeks. He makes her happy. It's no longer a surprise -- it hasn't been for some time now -- but she likes the way it feels. ]
You are burned into my memory, Dimitri. I will wear you near my heart, only a touch away.
[ Never alone. ]
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(It hasn't always been easy to match the tempo of their steps, not as children, and perhaps even less so as adults. Today, they are the perfect match for each other's song and dance.) ]
I could not think of a better place to call my home.
[ Speaking of which, the ring that dangles near his heart is a reminder, and he steals another glance at the pendants Edelgard has traded for. They are known to get carried away in their affections every so often, so perhaps it would be wise to make sure they are, indeed, wearing this means of communication they have just secured before the unpredictable strikes. ]
What say you, beloved? [ His free hand makes for his necklace again. ] Shall we add these pendants to the rings on our necklaces?
[ Or they could find a different place to wear their rings, maybe. He wouldn't mind that. ]
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And to her, after years of wrestling with her home being the place that houses her most unhappy memories, it's kind of a breath-taking thought. She has thought of her home in larger terms -- Enbarr, Adrestia, Fodlan -- and in her entire time here she has been resistant to the idea of thinking of this place as home.
But Dimitri? Her Dimitri? He makes an excellent home.
Ignore her soft eyes and the visible warmth in her cheeks. She's nodding her agreement! ]
The sooner the better.
[ But just a moment. Just one: she wants to lean her face up to his and give him the sweetest of brief kisses first, her joy threatening to spill out in the form of laughter. With that, she reaches to undo the clasp behind her neck. ]
I suppose it's possible that we will need to explain these necklaces to someone one day.
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(Maybe one day they can do nothing but indulge, together in a home of their choosing, free to dance until no sunset could pull them apart. But in the meantime, he takes her kiss, a gift so great he can never take for granted.) ]
To quite a few people, I am afraid. [ And though it's not a comfortable prospect by any means, he still manages to say it with an airy breath and a smile. ] And they will no doubt question the truth in our claims, every bit as much as the thought of marrying an enemy of war. That is, provided there still is a war to return to...
[ Perhaps he oughtn't be so distracted when his brute fingers engage with delicate work like unclasping his own necklace, but his mind wanders anyway. They have had reason to believe time stands still back in their own worlds, but does it truly? Does he even want it to be? He was once prepared to face the Edelgard back home until one of them no longer drew breath, but that thought has grown exponentially harder now that her face means so much more to him than just the memory of a dear childhood sweetheart. And if Byleth's accounts turn out to be the future that awaits him, then would he look at her transformed visage and see a grotesque creature unworthy of compassion... or a beloved monster instead?
He sighs, chest swelling with the depth of his feelings and sinking with the weight of his troubles. Their happiness is as selfish as is his wish that this moment would not be sullied; again they are matched, sin for sin, monster for monster. ]
Be it as it may, my choice has long since been made. [ And the silver chains coming undone from around his neck are just another reminder, metal pooling over metal at the center of a large open palm. ] I swore I would follow my heart, and it has led me back to you, time and time again. Whatever challenges await ahead, I trust that we shall see it through.
[ Time and time again, his hand reaches for her; right now, with an offer, a promise, a ring that dangles from a necklace like his heart from her fingertips. ]
Together.
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(She'd be lying if she claimed there wasn't some odd and unmentionable thrill in those secret meetings and conflicted feelings but how could she possibly have expected to end up here, asking Dimitri to marry her in front of their friends. Knowing he has considered himself that committed and in love for some time already. Happier and less alone than she has ever felt.
She supposes he has always had a talent for making her feel that way.) ]
You think you would tell the truth as soon as someone noticed it?
[ Hold on. His acknowledgement that his heart has lead him back to her time and time again, his certainty that they will rise to any challenge ahead... she can practically feel the pleasure churning through her brain. Once her pendant is safely around her neck, the chain clasped, her hand meets his again.
The next step -- besides marriage -- may be finding ways to make this wild story more... accessible to their nearest and dearest at home. Not everyone needs to know, of course, but she has every expectation that Hubert will pick up on subtle differences, even if she does her best to hide the chain around her neck. Would Dedue be as observant? ]
I think a great many people may doubt our sanity before we even reach the part about marrying the enemy. [ Which isn't to say that she disagrees with his certainty. Though her touch lingers, she slides his necklace out of his palm. ] I suppose that our means of communication could serve as proof of our claims-- [ Since she has experienced nothing quite like it at home. ] --but I must look just like the Edelgard you left behind.
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Still, he wants them to know the truth always, wants to hide nothing else from those he deems dearest. It is what they deserve, and what gives him any measure of peace. ]
Perhaps... not as soon as someone noticed, no. [ Because Dedue? That man can probably tell from a mile away that someone ate the weedelgard, and Dimitri doubts he could keep it from him. ] For one, and provided I do return to the exact time and place as I was before coming to the island, then I would be speaking of my love for the Emperor as we march on the imperial capital. Frankly, that is not something I would wish to do.
[ And surely she can understand why. As much as they know their counterparts are different people, at the same time... they are not. They are the same in face, name, soul, even in shared history; at the end of his long road, he will have to challenge the Edelgard who is, in so many ways, the same as the woman he loves. ]
I suppose I would start with a compromise. A way to both reassure them I will not stray from my path, and reinforce my resolve to reach out to Edelgard to the very last. There is not much else I should say until the war's conclusion, but when that time comes...
[ Well. That will heavily depend on how the war concludes, and whether or not both he and that Edelgard come out alive. That would be the most favorable outcome, but what would it mean for her? Another lifetime in prison, her closest friends gone? Death might be kinder, but he's selfish.
With his own necklace in her hands, he reaches for her pendant, thumb idly running across the small metal surface. A thought flashes across his mind, just an impulse. ]
If she is alive when the war is over-- [ His eyebrows furrow, as though he has yet to digest his own train of thoughts. ] Do you think... she would listen to you?
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But it is difficult to imagine.
She threads his necklace through the small loop on his pendant, her expression thoughtful. Would she listen to herself? Her eyes stray to his face for a moment, then down at his large fingers on her own pendant. She has to be honest, as dissatisfying as the answer is: ]
I'm not certain. If the attempt is made after everything plays out as Byleth described, perhaps not.
[ It depends on how it is handled, she supposes, but if she has lost everything, if she has fought him in the palace and been defeated, if her allies are dead or scattered, if she has transformed... ]
There was no-- [ She pauses slightly, as though gathering her thoughts. ] --room in Byleth's account for personal details about her. [ This isn't even particularly Byleth's fault; it seems there wasn't exactly time for in-depth discussion with her counterpart. ] Such as whether the transformation had any affect on her [ my ] mind. Regardless, I think hearing me speak more or less as your ally could simply be a betrayal at that point.
[ What a shame that she thinks herself unlikely to grant a second parley so soon. Not even to the boy who kept her from losing her heart in the most difficult time of her life. Her eyes meet his again and she offers a tight smile. ]
I'm sure you now understand why trust would be so difficult for her to measure out but imagine learning that you are one of multiple versions of yourself and you may be the least fortunate. Worse, you have only learned this when you are no longer in a position for another Dimitri's knowledge to be of actionable benefit.
I am not unwilling to speak to her. On the contrary, I wonder if there is anyone better equipped to deal with our counterparts than ourselves and I think we should consider this further. Even so, it would be hard for her to give weight to what I say.
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I appreciate your honesty. [ This much, he can say in earnest. ] In all truth, it is as I suspected: she may be beyond my reach at this point, and the Professor's accounts only reinforced that thought. But I--
[ The breath he expels is something of a groan, a shake of his head marking his frustration. There are so many ways for him to finish that sentence: that he should have reached for her sooner, that he doesn't want to lose anyone else, that he still cares about her against all odds, that he wishes to save her though it may not be his place to. Would it bother this Edelgard -- his El -- to hear of his depth of feeling for her counterpart? He doesn't think her given to jealousy, but this is a very unique circumstance they find themselves in.
But his El is not beyond his reach, and so reach he does, his palm moving up from her pendant to cup her cheek, thumb stroking skin. No matter how far his thoughts stray, he would be hard pressed to look at that face and not feel a smile spring up in his. ]
You are my one and only beloved. But whether out of fondness for the little girl who was once my dearest, or the feelings I have for the woman standing before me... Across infinite timelines, I know there is no Edelgard von Hresvelg whose smile I would not love to see.
[ As long as they carry even a small fraction of the El he befriended or the El he came to love, so too will they carry a piece of his heart. Going forward, it is only fair that his wife should know. ]
My apologies, I did not mean to sour such momentous occasion. I know that she would call me foolish for it.
[ Is this one of the many ways in which his El and her counterpart are the same, or is this where they differ? He's still waiting on a verdict. ]
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Leave out the manipulated intimacy and the fact that they didn't choose to come here and much about their story is...
Well, surprisingly romantic. The romance she once told both Dorothea and, more recently, Dimitri himself that she expected to never have. That much she is grateful for. To know love, and more specifically his love. ]
Dimitri--
[ His large soft heart is not foolish on its own. There have been times when she painted him with broad strokes, thinking his heart was too soft or he was too attached to the Church or he was incapable of action when it was needed, and she doesn't think she has always been wrong when judging him but their lives are complications upon complications and she has had a chance to learn his shades of gray by now. ]
--I am not certain that I ever felt particularly special before I met you. Do you know that? I was not by nature an unhappy child but I was one of many and sometimes felt it. I was my father's daughter or someone's sister.
[ And then the experimentation she endured made her a type of special she would not ever have wanted, but that isn't the point she wants to make. The point is that knowing there is so much affection for her in that large soft heart of his still sometimes takes her by surprise. The fact that they can never be those children again doesn't actually detract from the fact that they were those children.
And many of the things she wanted as a child she still wants now.
With a hint of something like pride, she leans in to return his necklace to his rightful place. Not without a small kiss to the side of his face. ]
You have not soured our occasion. I'm pleased that we can speak about difficult subjects and work together to lessen the bloodshed in our future.
[ Combining their strength, one might say. Once the necklace is clasped behind his neck, she frames his face with her hands. ]
I would like for my counterpart to live and see her goals achieved and have a taste of personal happiness. If she cannot see her way past a cell of course she will not go along willingly. But perhaps there is a way to tell her what you know and find a goal that can be worked toward together. Byleth's past does not have to be your future. We will write that ourselves.
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But these days? He can see how she would be made to feel special-- because he actively tries, because she has always been a special presence in his life, through highs and lows. Perhaps she'll never quite understand the full depth of his feelings for her, because she never quite witnessed how deep his hatred ran, but what he told her several months ago remains true. And what else is there to say of a man who loves her more than his once only reason to keep breathing? ]
I can only trust that we will, my beloved. [ He has to, lest that large soft heart of his will shatter. ] And right here and now, between your warm hands, I do. This bright future that you have envisioned... may it be intertwined with mine forevermore.
[ The details of which can be discussed at length and planned for at a later moment, because right now? All he wants is to close his eyes and lean into her touch, her hands dwarfed under his, the curve of his chest swelling and deflating with each deep breath. For all that his mind sometimes will race with affliction for the lives and fates that are beyond his reach, she can calm the tempest every bit as well as she could once cast it.
The breath he exhales is short and bittersweet. ]
It is somewhat of an ironic thought, is it not?
[ Does he intend to leave her in the shadows? Of course not. The pause he takes is only so he can see her again, a gentle brush of his knuckles treating her cheek. ]
You, who would once see yourself as though being no more than your war, and I, a man who is only good for war. Perhaps that is why only you can make me feel at such peace.
[ If Edelgard is her war, then in her Dimitri has found his Somewhere to Belong. ]
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When he leans into her touch, she welcomes it like she could roll herself in his affection and be buoyant for the rest of her days. She has spent too much time heavy with dire purpose. ]
You are not only good for war. In fact, you have proven yourself capable of building bridges.
[ Still, what he says isn't lost on her. There is a certain odd balance in it, and more importantly she is glad to know that she brings him peace. ]
But I will take you all the same. [ Urging his hand toward her lips, she kisses his open palm and then folds his fingers as though to trap that affection in place. ] Together we may even be good for love.
[ The words sound a bit strange to her own ears. They aren't grounded in any grim practicality; he rekindles her hope. ]
There is something else I'd like for us to do but I think it should wait until the weather clears. [ The snow may not be cold but by the end of a walk they could be covered in it. ] Perhaps later tonight.
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Ah, what a silly thought. He just made a vow that Edelgard would never be alone again; that also means neither will he. ]
That may be something else we have learned together.
[ And he will treasure every bit of it, the affection she places right at the center of his palm and that he holds on to with all of his strength-- and his closed fist even draws Hugo's attention for a moment, his little snout trying to sniff out the promise of a hidden snack, but alas, this particular kind of treat is only meant for the larger feline in the room. ]
Ah, you are full of surprises today, eh? [ After a moment's pause for some brief ear scratches -- what a heinous crime it would be, to deny his cat some of his own affection -- Dimitri turns to Edelgard again, his full attention freely given. ] What is it that you would like to do? An evening stroll if you cannot fall asleep?
[ However long it has been since their days of sporadic evening walks and late night messages, already it feels like a lifetime ago. ]
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I think I'm still learning.
[ Obviously falling in love with Dimitri has been... a process, though in some ways it has been easier than one might expect, helped along significantly by their forced separation from the war and the utter absence of those who slither in the dark. It will still be a challenge to build bridges whenever she returns.
But Hugo's curious sniffing makes her let out a small laugh. The hand she holds out to him is also sadly empty but beckoning with a promise of scratches. There are no felines in this apartment who don't like that! ]
What I had in mind was an evening stroll before we even consider sleep.
[ A walk together is something they could do at any time but there's a specific purpose driving this! Timing is important. ]
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Is that truly all you had in mind? [ A good-humored lilt lingers in his voice, but he does narrow his eyes in curious suspicion. ] I would not object, far from it, but I reckon there is no need for such formality over a simple evening stroll together.
[ Well. Admittedly she is still a fair bit formal without any real need for it, much like she was about their teatime in the balcony; he now understands she had grander plans to unfold, and perhaps that is why he expects something more of their promised walk. ]
Be it as it may, know that you may ask whatever you wish of me. As long as it is in my power, you every whim will be met today.
[ It's only fair, isn't it? She's just given him everything he could ask for. ]
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