[ How Dimitri lives here seems fairly close to normalcy, under the circumstances. Close friends that he relies on? A cat? It's difficult for her to wrap her mind around. There is a sense that he is more comfortable here than she is, perhaps because those she recalls him closest to arrived around the same time he did.
A bittersweet thought that brings Hubert to mind again. Her oldest and most trusted friend, and this is the longest she has been without him since they were children. Even though she envies Dimitri's seeming ability to adapt, she only wants to become so accustomed to this place. She is here temporarily, not bound or caged but nonetheless imprisoned. ]
You can't possibly mean to do without for my sake. As your guest I insist that we halve it when we are ready to try it.
[ No arguments allowed on this, Dimitri, and the mildly stern look she aims at him says as much.
She helps herself to one of the chairs at the table. ]
[ It's not quite comfort that drives his actions in this place, though it is true he adapts with ease-- it's the only reason he survived those five years. It's simply that he's learned not to focus so much on the future that he forgets to live in the moment; there's no building a brighter tomorrow by trampling on the present.
Still, that Look is... definitely familiar. It's one he knows better than to challenge, and so he doesn't. Not that he would want to, anyway. That bittersweet pang of nostalgia burns vividly at the thought and the memory of sharing dessert with her.
(For all that he wants to cherish the present, the past haunts him, still.) ]
Then I suppose you leave me no choice but to comply.
[ The smile, at least, comes easy enough to him; knowing how to proceed past cordial niceties, not so much.
So he buys himself some time as he serves the tea, first pouring it in the cup he had set aside for Edelgard, before filling up his own. It's only then that he joins her across the table, taking a tentative sip; chamomile would have worked best to calm his nerves, but this will have to do. ]
Now. [ Another beat as he sets the cup down. ] I believe there was an agreement you wished to discuss with me. I am prepared to listen to your terms.
[ Or maybe not, but he sure isn't backing down from this. ]
[ He complies with cake demands and sexual demands easily enough. Since their initial reunion here she has wondered why he is not more hostile toward her, but now she has to suspect that there is some difference in what she has experienced versus what he has experienced.
It's bergamot tea again. She had wondered if he recalled her preference from their time at the Academy or simply asked the robots for a tea she would enjoy, and now she supposes it could even be that in this Dimitri's version of events they knew each other better.
Odd to think about. She was not particularly in the market for friendships at the Academy, much less a friendship with him or Claude.
It's good tea, though; just as before, she holds it up to her lips and breathes it in before she takes a sip. When she lowers her cup she doesn't quite lower it all the way to the table. ]
My proposal is, as we said before, that we stop letting ourselves get surprised by compromising situations. Much seems to be out of our hands at the moment but I assume that you are as eager to return to Fódlan as I am, whether we do so through compliant behavior like completing the tasks given to us or by improving the island until we have a way to thwart our captors and send ourselves home. You have proven willing to make exchanges in the past so...
[ Now she does put her cup down on the table's surface. ]
I am willing to continue to do it. We can meet regularly to exchange a square for a square. We will tell no one else, and either of us can end the agreement at any time. I will even go so far as to say that you can contact me if you find yourself somehow influenced again and I will help you if I am available, as long as it ultimately leads to another successful exchange.
[ Eager to return to Fódlan, huh... Yes, perhaps she is, having already put so much on the line for the sake of her war. And while Dimitri does wish to return home and see to his responsibilities, can he in good conscience say that's his only reason for going through with this? ]
I understand.
[ It's all he chooses to answer, instead, figuring his motives are his own, and likely irrelevant to her in the grand scheme. His cooperation is all she's after-- and all he should expect from her in return. ]
You say as long as it leads to a successful exchange, but there is one issue with that. [ A small pause as he sips his tea and tries to gather his thoughts. How is he even supposed to treat this so casually, like they're discussing the weather... ] We have had at least one previous experience with marking off a different square than we had agreed upon, and that leads me to believe there may be a chance it might fail altogether at some point. In that case, I assume you would be willing to not assign fault to either party?
[ Because, look? He tried really hard to aim for "oral fixation" that one time, and he would wouldn't want to be accused of trying to sabotage their deal in any way. The very nature of their agreement might be... about as peculiar as this island, but he still has his honor! ]
[ The question, not completely unreasonable, makes her feel a pinprick of heat in her cheeks. Still, she soldiers on. ]
No, I will not blame you for doing your best to fulfill a square and failing.
[ Does she want that to happen? Absolutely not. Is it a problem she has encountered before or heard of someone else encountering? No. The risk seems slim.
And if it does happen she supposes she can hardly blame Dimitri or herself as long as they both tried their best. ]
Although perhaps for more complicated or less obvious squares we should try to educate ourselves before an attempt in order to minimize any risk of that.
[ Just as you would not want to rush into battle with a dull blade you do not want to rush into specific intimate acts without having a solid idea of what they are.
It's entirely at odds with this conversation but she reaches carefully for one of the pastries, willing to use both it and her cup of tea where she can't use her axe and shield. ]
If that sounds fair to you we can compare cards and first look for squares we have in common, or perhaps ones that would be complementary.
[ Wow. Way to imply only he can fail at this, as though she's some kind of sexual deviant-- even if she likely does have more experience than him.
(... what if she is, though? She did very much sit astride his face like it was no skin off her back-- ah, no, better not let his train of thoughts derail down that path.)
So he focuses on what she says next and, oh, it seems they can be like-minded, on occasion. But to think they would agree on this faster than they would on the fate of an entire continent... ]
I do. [ A nod, and he places his cup down again; if they are to compare cards, he will be needing that arm. ] In fact, that is the reason why I asked for a few days before we could meet. I cannot say I knew what several of my own squares entailed, but the library in this place provides... quite the wealth of knowledge.
[ So yes, this is what his preparations meant: studying up on kinks. Did he maybe learn more than absolutely necessary? Possibly. Is he ever going to look at horses the same way again? Absolutely not. But he did what he had to do, so this meeting wouldn't be a waste of time to either of them.
With a deep breath to steel himself, he taps his bracelet a couple of times and leans over, arm reaching across the table so Edelgard can look at the screen, his A5 card on display. It's alarming, really, how he's getting used to this. ]
If there are any squares on my card that you need explained, I should be able to assist.
[ It never feels any less invasive, exposing his card like that, but at least half the squares that have been marked off were Edelgard's doing, so there's little point in feeling embarrassed over those, at least. ]
[ Ah, so that is how he made use of the delay requested. It's almost amusing, in a way, though she respects the effort. Since her arrival she too has had to seek information about certain squares.
A bite of the puff pastry and a swallow of her tea, and then she's mentally braced herself for the necessary practicality of comparing cards with him. She hasn't actually done this before, not a side-by-side comparison. A hint of pink returns to her cheeks as she pulls hers up and rests her arm on the table to offer him a better view of her own card.
She doesn't need to look at what he has already marked off... but she does despite herself. Ultimately she wonders how he ended up with things like cuddling and tickling on his card while she has squares like rimming, anal, begging?
Well. She doesn't envy his coercion square, at least. Frankly, she isn't sure why just being here and doing as asked while kept away from their normal lives doesn't automatically fit the bill. ]
I am uncertain of what "pervertibles" means.
[ And perhaps the mechanical square, within this context, but she has learned that there are accessories that can be used during sex and some may fall under this category. Regardless, she spots a few promising squares. ]
We both have leaving marks. [ And he has certainly done it before. ] As well as endurance and service. [ She pauses, feeling a twinge of self-consciousness as she continues looking for matches. They have more squares in common than she expected, but that will make this easier. ] What have you learned about sensation play?
[ It never gets easier, to look into another person's card, even less so when they have squares marked off-- because then it's just too hard to pull his mind back from wandering, from picturing them in the act-- and with Edelgard, it's... well. There's a lot to unpack, and the fact that at least one those squares was his doing only adds up to the stash of very conflicted feelings about this ordeal.
(Vaguely, he wonders if one of those other two might have been from their last time. There had certainly been enough rubbing and grinding to meet the requirements, but... what in the worlds is rimming? Something to inquire about later.)
For now, he focuses on the surprising amount of overlap between their tasks, and at how Edelgard expects elaboration as he had offered. He knew it would probably come to this, but now that the prospect of having to do so is imminent... ah. He might need a sip of that tea right about now. ]
That means... introducing household objects into the act. [ If he keeps this as clinical as possible, it should be doable, right? ] It could be a pillow to [ grind ] rub against, or kitchenware like a spatula used to... strike. [ aka spanking, which Edelgard unfortunately has on her card, and he would really rather avoid such violent connotations. ] Apparently, it could even be food.
[ Which... she also has? Wow, he's not trying to imply anything here-- although maybe he should? He wasn't sure what could possibly make for complementary squares but now that they're actually doing drawing comparisons, he's just... naturally coming up with a lot? Where is this even coming from?!
Tea. He needs more of that. And possibly a deep breath or two. He really, really wasn't trained for this. ]
Incidentally, food may also be employed for sensation play. [ He's just going to be over here, an idle stare at his own puff pastry as he actively avoids taking a bite. Would that be too suggestive? Wow, what a mess, he's a mess. ] Ice, to be more precise. To be quite frank, I find it rather puzzling that something so innocuous could be a potential match for so many different squares...
[ Her eyebrows rise. It is admittedly not her most eloquent moment, but she recovers well enough despite the renewed flood of heat in her cheeks. This is an important discussion, if they are to follow through with it. ]
In that case I suppose that your pervertibles square could be paired with quite a few of mine if we get a bit creative.
[ Perhaps even a handle or a hilt used instead of fingers at some point? Thoroughly cleaned before and after. She makes the connection between striking and spanking as well, and she's not sure she likes the idea of Dimitri spanking her. She isn't sure she likes the idea of anyone spanking her, but the square doesn't come with a minimum number of swats required so she could allow someone to do it once... if she doesn't simply do it herself.
Still, she thinks she'll steer him toward other squares first. ]
Since we both have sensation play we could try that together. Or we could try pairing yours with my food square and mine with... your tickling or teasing squares, perhaps?
[ Her blush isn't dying down quickly, but at least the words come a bit more easily now that she's resolutely sinking her teeth into the conversation. ]
Edited (some days I just don't know why I html) 2020-09-30 05:30 (UTC)
[ He would be lying if he said the thought of using the hilt of a sword hasn't crossed his mind since he further studied his squares-- really, the ones found in the forge seem to be especially designed for that purpose-- but also, he's not sure the idea of... impaling his so-called enemy with even the dull end of a blade would be in line with keeping their truce, or even arousing at all. Maybe they should add a clause for "no weapons in the bedroom" just for good measure; it's not like either of them has knife play on their cards.
(No, he did not consciously look for that one, and yes, Fate must have laughed at his face when his research led him to that kink in particular. Probably the only time he's ever been glad Edelgard doesn't remember he gave her that dagger.) ]
I suppose trying for something with such a wide range of coverage would maximize our odds for at least one match each. [ But why did it have to be food, though? It's right there on the table, all too suggestive, like somehow he had planned for this outcome! Ugh. ] Since there is a precedent for a different square to be marked off instead, however, it might be best to plan for one combination at a time, then see if we are successful.
[ The alternative is to make a list of all possible complementary squares and invoke the respective clause mid-sex. Annex I, section 3: Domination/Submission, item 2: Begging. Raunchy. ]
On the positive side, I have heard rumors about how aiming for multiple squares at once might net us better rewards. I have not tried it myself-- [ that he knows of yet, because some of us have been too lazy to turn in multikink requests. ] --but keeping our options ample might be a good way to test the hypothesis.
[ Let it be known he is very specifically talking about the gray area that is the combination of food/sensation play/pervertibles, and in no way suggesting they go for entire lines from each of their cards! That would require nothing short of a marathon! Now wouldn't that just be terrible! ]
[ Her eyes move from his card to his face, studying him. ]
A reasonable idea. Since many of these have similar themes and elements that should be simple enough. We can agree on which squares a day or two beforehand if we need time to gather supplies or do more research. [ "Gather supplies." As though they are going on a mission. She doesn't sigh at her wording but she does pause, her gaze returning to his card. ] I am not opposed to trying to achieve rewards for multiple squares at once but I have never seen more than one square at a time marked. You and I have already touched on several that remain unmarked on my card.
[ Improving her quality of life is nice but figuring out what allows her to go home is more important to her, particularly now that she has luxuries that afford her privacy, clean clothes, and effortlessly quick hot baths. ]
As I said, though, so many of these are complementary that it may not take much effort to test the theory. [ Her finger points to the four squares making up her bottom right corner. ] This group seems like it would work well together, for example: begging, messy, endurance, and power play.
[ Again, her eyes dart to him. ]
If you would be willing to beg under these circumstances, that is.
[ It doesn't show on his face, and he certainly can't fault her for her choice of words, but calling this "gathering supplies" sure makes it sound like a quest for the Byleth-- and for a split second, he's absolutely mortified at the very intrusive thought of their Professor dropping necessities by their door as though they were lost items. He doesn't think he could live with himself.
Thankfully(?) what Edelgard says next captures his attention again, although the realization that comes from that is only... marginally less mortifying. He was only reading her card in terms of potential matches and what else was left to fulfill, but upon second glance, yes, there is an awful lot they have done: leaving marks, oral sex... multiple orgasms. Oh, goodness, how did all of that even happen? And, more importantly--
How can Edelgard be so nonchalant about asking if he would be willing to beg-- not for his life, but for sexual release? What happened to being visibly flustered over this conversation?! ]
Begging. [ He echoes, and that single hooked eyebrow might be the only real expression he has offered for the past few minutes-- pretty sure his soul has ascended and ejected itself from this mortal plane of existence. ] I would have to give it more careful consideration. I might not be downright opposed to it, though it would require a significant level of trust.
[ War context aside, they are still very much new to this as... partners, so it could be something to build with time-- and assuming Edelgard could keep this fair, to begin with. It is quite a lot to ask of your enemy, after all! Which reminds him: ]
For the sake of argument, and in the interest of fairness-- [ A brief pause for tea, an excuse to collect his jumbled thoughts. ] How would you propose we keep that exchange balanced, if I did agree to those specific terms?
[ After spending so much of the initial conversation with too much lingering heat in her cheeks, seeing his arched brow is delicious.
What a shame that he comes up with a question that brings a bit of that pink back to her face. ]
I don't think it would necessarily need to be something that requires trust. [ Her tone stays even. ] If coupled with a dominance and submission square or bondage... then yes, I agree that it may require more trust. However, begging could also be treated a bit like a challenge, couldn't it? A verbal agreement not to touch yourself while I take my time with you, as opposed to physical restraints.
[ Significantly less trust required.
This is not a conversation she ever could have imagined herself having with someone. She picks up her cup again, using the time it takes her to lift it to her lips and sip her tea as an opportunity to gather her thoughts. ]
Obviously we would agree that either of us can put a stop to it at any time, just as we have agreed to similar terms for the general agreement. I would want to consider it further but it's possible that our fair exchange could extend to these particular squares as well. In the interest of balance there is the possibility of trading roles. We both have dominance and submission squares. We both have service. You have leashes and collars; I have bondage and power play. If you are at my mercy for one square I may be willing to let you take the reins for a different square. Would that be enough balance, in your opinion?
[ ... no, seriously, how does she do it? Flushed though she is, to speak so openly of these acts-- and worse, to so casually suggest that he should take the reins for a future square, that is just...
Well. Several moons ago, he would have thrived in the prospect of having her at his mercy, her graceful neck gripped in one hand, squeezing every last breath out of her until bone snapped-- and, oh, how did it arouse him. For countless nights, he would pleasure himself to thoughts of a different scenario-- chasing her off the battlefield and drilling her into the ground as she pleaded for her life, fucking her mouth to shut her screams, it didn't matter. It all culminated in death for her, and release for him. But now, and as much as he has come to accept that beast will always be a part of him... it shames him, deeply so.
And yet, it all seems so inconsequential to Edelgard-- the same Edelgard who was told to choose how he should kill her, in richness of detail. He wouldn't expect her to fear him, but... does she truly have no reservations about relinquishing control to him, of all people? ]
You seem rather secure in your ability to handle it.
[ That resolute self-assurance, the strength to march onward without ever looking back, all the qualities she displays with ease and that he lacks... Yes, this would definitely require considerable trust-- in himself, if nothing else.
(Even now, he must rise to meet her, still.) ]
I do suppose that would ensure a balanced exchange, though. [ The twinge of sadness from before is gone from his voice, now more collected, her eyes under blue scrutiny. He's not backing down from his decision. ] However, since you also would rather consider this further, I propose we start elsewhere, as we grow more acquainted with the idea.
[ And since they have oh so drastically moved on from the topic of incorporating food into less than innocent contexts, he will take this brief lull to finally reach for his puff pastry, bringing it up to his lips. It stays untouched for a second longer, as he only bites into it after another question: ]
I presume you must be familiar with the concept of safe words, as well?
[ Her eyebrows rise slightly. She has to interject. ]
I am just as capable of handling you in this as I am in battle.
[ For him to believe anything else would be offensive.
All along she has expected him to be hostile, but if he wanted to harm her he has had ample opportunity, moments where they were unarmed and unarmored and entangled. Based on his behavior here -- and his behavior when they were students -- she would not be surprised to have him tell her their truce is over before taking an action that would end it.
What can he possibly think he would be doing to her if she agreed to take a less dominant role? Perhaps... she should go to the library later, to address lingering questions. ]
But I do not disagree. There are easier and more appropriate squares we can work through.
[ Even after her attention returns to her cup she can feel the weight of his eyes. To say she is glad for a moment's break is an understatement and one she has no intention of admitting to him, but his question takes her by surprise. She takes a generous drink of her tea before she answers. ]
[ Ah, there we go. Why does she always have to be so proud? Not once would he question her capabilities in the field of battle, but this isn't like war whatsoever-- and quite frankly, given the state of (in)completion of her card, he wouldn't think she's faring any better than he is.
And considering her following question, he's really starting to feel she doesn't even know much about her own squares. At least she asks instead of pretending to be in control, as she might have done, once; he'll call that progress. ]
Safe words. [ He repeats, with a hard swallow of his pastry. ] They are used in a domination and submission context, as a means to safeguard the submissive partner. Since there can be elements of pain, physical restraints or even dubious consent-- [ and he's not even going into downright non-con and rape fantasies because thankfully it's not a square for either of them, and because the thought still disturbs him far too much for words. ] --these words come into play as an indisputable warning, or a call to cease the act immediately.
[ There, a very clinical relaying of his thorough studies. Annette would be proud, though personally, Dimitri feels like his skin is about to melt and leave his bones exposed, anytime now; even the sip of tea he intakes feels chilly in comparison. ]
Given the nature of our agreement, it might be wise to establish them early on. Naturally, telling me to stop at any time would be enough under any circumstance, but if there is a possibility we might attempt that particular set of squares at a later point, then we could consider this training.
[ This time she's stubborn enough to keep her "oh" on the tip of her tongue, trapped behind her teeth. ]
When I spoke to a few people of the difference between domination and power play before, safe words were not mentioned.
[ It's an explanation, of sorts. She is not clueless about this, but... she obviously does not know as much as she thought and the return trip to the library begins to seem more necessary by the moment. And somehow Dimitri of the Arched Brow manages to recite all this as though he has practiced the explanation. Perhaps he has.
Could she be accused of holding her tea a bit like a shield again right now? Yes. ]
It was suggested to me that power play specifically emphasizes an imbalanced dynamic of power between partners and may involve playacting. If either of us is to play a role of some kind -- a more coerced role, specifically -- then I suppose I see the value of agreeing on key words ahead of time. When I am simply Edelgard, however, I think the word "stop" should be instructive enough, don't you?
[ She can't imagine saying that and not meaning it, especially within this context. ]
If we do attempt these more complicated squares then I think it would be wise for us to both agree on any... accessories used or acts that may be done ahead of time. As an example, I am unwilling to be bound. If you decide to assist me with my bondage square, you will need to be bound.
[ The slightest hesitation. ]
For someone of your effortless strength that may not be an issue at all.
[ ... hmm. He is the one who potentially has to beg, and he should be the one to be bound-- and these are both her squares, on top of it. He can't say he's all that surprised, but she really is too demanding, at times. ]
I find it hard to believe someone of your strength would have an issue with light binding. [ His tone is still measured even as his fingers drum on the handle of his cup, eyes still fixed on hers. ] A silken scarf could be employed for both, bondage and sensation play, for instance.
[ He can respect that if it's a personal preference or boundary, but he is not too fond of the implication he should yield to her every whim simply because of his unnatural physical prowess. ]
However, if you do not feel comfortable with the thought of being restrained, then I have no intention of imposing on you. Likewise, if you do not wish to rehearse the use of safe words in advance, we shall only agree on those when and if we do decide to tackle those squares; in the meantime, a simple "stop" should more than suffice.
[ Another sip of tea, and the cup lingers before his lips for a moment longer, a shield of his own. ]
If I do agree to being bound, though, then you must agree to not bring any weapons. Concealed or otherwise.
[ While they're talking of comfort levels, this should be reasonable enough, considering their usual standing. And yes, that includes the dagger he knows oh so well; we don't want any accidental knife play in the bedroom, now do we? ]
[ She had not thought of using something as simple as a silken scarf. His point is a fair one, an efficient one, and as far as bindings go she imagines that would be among the most pleasant possibilities.
But she will not bend on this and she's about to say as much when he continues. Fortunately, he doesn't actually protest her opinion... and she reminds herself that it is fine for them to disagree on things here. Within this conversation disagreeing on something means finding a different solution that they can agree on. It doesn't render the entire proposal pointless.
Not until it does.
And even if it did, it would not take much to convince herself that it is for the best. ]
I assume you are recalling my dagger. [ She shakes her head slightly. ] Do you truly think it fair to expect me to come to where you live -- where your weapons are housed -- without one of my own? If you agree to be bound, I will agree to disarm ahead of time. I will let you watch as I set my weapon aside. If you prefer, I could even tuck it inside one of your drawers until we have finished.
[ ... oh, hmm. He hadn't actually considered they would be carrying out their Auspicious Acts in his lodgings, but considering she came over because this was the best place they could think of for a private meeting... yes, it does stand to reason they would continue to do so in his apartment-- in which case, Edelgard does have a point. ]
Right you are. [ His eyes drop to the teacup in his hand, and this may be the first time during this conversation that he avoids her gaze on purpose. ] I should not ask you to part with it.
[ Not the dagger-- not the one he gave her, the one she's kept all these years, always on her person. That would be unfair to the both of them.
He fills the lingering silence with a bite of his pastry, ruminating on his meal and his feelings. With any luck, Edelgard will take it only as a pause to consider the compromise and nothing else. ]
If we do go through with it, you can leave your weapon with the rest of mine, and this way you will also know where I keep them. [ A show of good faith, in a way.] Would you find that acceptable?
[ Now she feels particularly aware of the dagger, hidden beneath her blouse this time. She makes him wait through another drink and a thoughtful mouthful of her pastry before she folds her hands on the surface of the table and gives him a nod. ]
I would accept that. And I apologize if I was wrong in my assumption that you would be willing to continue to meet here. If hosting makes you uneasy we should scout for a location where neither of us is expected. I am willing to do that at any time as well.
[ Another pause, shorter. She helps herself to her last bite of pastry. ]
[ This time, the shake of his head is immediate, secure in his decision. ]
There is no need to apologize. My lodgings were suitable enough for this meeting, and if you are not opposed to coming over more regularly, then we may continue to use it for privacy. As for further discussions...
[ Hmm. Maybe they should agree to stop apologizing so much, for starters? Although he supposes having this agreement would effectively eliminate the need for... a good number of the reasons that have driven either of them to apologize, so far. ]
Aside from being bound, is there anything else you would rather not have included in our future meetings?
[ He doesn't expect an extensive list off the top of her head, of course, but maybe something like... guidelines? Or just any other hard nos she can think of, really. ]
[ That also seems like a reasonable question. If only she had enough experience to give him what would feel like a better and more detailed answer. ]
I have not disliked anything we have done together.
[ While it warms her cheeks again to say it, this seems like the most basic and informative starting point. He was there: he has memories of what they did and did not do. ]
Being bound or otherwise incapacitated is the primary thing I would like to avoid. I haven't looked at many other cards, but I know there are at least a few possible acts that are much more sadistic than what I see on either of ours. I would not wish to burn you or cause long-term physical scarring and I would prefer to be treated with the same courtesy.
[ Is there a type of intimacy in it? Yes. Are her torturous childhood memories something she wants to combine with sex? No.
No.
How dry her mouth feels! She takes yet another sip of tea and notices that she has nearly finished it. ]
[ Not disliked anything they've done together, huh... Well. Yes, he definitely remembers what they did and did not do, and it is a relief that he hasn't offended her in any way, influenced or not. It's a good framework to start with, and he might have to get back to that soon, but first: ]
The same applies to myself, as well. Considering we share a square for marking, I can endure light scarring and even minor bleeding. [ Like the scratch of her nails, though he's not going to say that out loud. ] However, burns are something I would especially like to steer clear from.
[ She might have even spotted the larger burn scars on his back by now, and though they do carry a meaning he is proud to bear-- the memory that he has saved someone-- he would rather not associate any sexual acts to the tragedy that took so many loved ones from him. ]
As for what we have done before--
[ His own cup is still halfway down, but he notices Edelgard has almost run out of tea, so he reaches for the pot and leans over across the table to pour her some more. ]
Is there anything you would like to have included again in our meetings?
[ It's good hospitality and all, but perhaps he should've timed his question just a little better, instead of asking from this up and close, steam rising between them. ]
And then finds herself wondering if he's looked at himself in the mirror and examined the marks she left on him just as she has with her own mirror. Little dark splotches standing out on her skin, evidence of the path his mouth took. A reminder of what they have done.
As long as they continue this discussion it should not surprise her if her mind wanders to related incidents a bit, should it? It's almost a good thing that he leans over the table toward her to refill her cup, and the thought that he may be rising to kiss her is chased from her mind as quickly as it appears.
If she could will the heat out of her cheeks she certainly would. Part of her is startled by the question, and part of her thinks it just as reasonable as the last. They want it to be pleasurable intimacy. If nothing else, feeling good should help put them at ease.
Still, he monopolizes her attention entirely until he straightens. The way his hair falls forward when he leans, the laces at the front of his shirt, the pale gold sweep of his eyelashes. She barely even blinks. ]
I have enjoyed being licked. [ She has to quickly decide how far she is willing to go with this, and even though she expects her fair complexion to glow with heat she takes it the step further. He asked, and she is answering. ] I enjoyed having you in my mouth while your own was on me.
[ Does she go on to say that in the interest of fairness she would be willing to pleasure him orally until he reaches climax, whether or not he happens to be licking her at the time? Perhaps she'll sit on that particular thought until they are actually working on squares rather than sitting at a table and talking. There may not even be a need to speak of it before trying it. ]
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A bittersweet thought that brings Hubert to mind again. Her oldest and most trusted friend, and this is the longest she has been without him since they were children. Even though she envies Dimitri's seeming ability to adapt, she only wants to become so accustomed to this place. She is here temporarily, not bound or caged but nonetheless imprisoned. ]
You can't possibly mean to do without for my sake. As your guest I insist that we halve it when we are ready to try it.
[ No arguments allowed on this, Dimitri, and the mildly stern look she aims at him says as much.
She helps herself to one of the chairs at the table. ]
Shall we get started then?
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Still, that Look is... definitely familiar. It's one he knows better than to challenge, and so he doesn't. Not that he would want to, anyway. That bittersweet pang of nostalgia burns vividly at the thought and the memory of sharing dessert with her.
(For all that he wants to cherish the present, the past haunts him, still.) ]
Then I suppose you leave me no choice but to comply.
[ The smile, at least, comes easy enough to him; knowing how to proceed past cordial niceties, not so much.
So he buys himself some time as he serves the tea, first pouring it in the cup he had set aside for Edelgard, before filling up his own. It's only then that he joins her across the table, taking a tentative sip; chamomile would have worked best to calm his nerves, but this will have to do. ]
Now. [ Another beat as he sets the cup down. ] I believe there was an agreement you wished to discuss with me. I am prepared to listen to your terms.
[ Or maybe not, but he sure isn't backing down from this. ]
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It's bergamot tea again. She had wondered if he recalled her preference from their time at the Academy or simply asked the robots for a tea she would enjoy, and now she supposes it could even be that in this Dimitri's version of events they knew each other better.
Odd to think about. She was not particularly in the market for friendships at the Academy, much less a friendship with him or Claude.
It's good tea, though; just as before, she holds it up to her lips and breathes it in before she takes a sip. When she lowers her cup she doesn't quite lower it all the way to the table. ]
My proposal is, as we said before, that we stop letting ourselves get surprised by compromising situations. Much seems to be out of our hands at the moment but I assume that you are as eager to return to Fódlan as I am, whether we do so through compliant behavior like completing the tasks given to us or by improving the island until we have a way to thwart our captors and send ourselves home. You have proven willing to make exchanges in the past so...
[ Now she does put her cup down on the table's surface. ]
I am willing to continue to do it. We can meet regularly to exchange a square for a square. We will tell no one else, and either of us can end the agreement at any time. I will even go so far as to say that you can contact me if you find yourself somehow influenced again and I will help you if I am available, as long as it ultimately leads to another successful exchange.
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I understand.
[ It's all he chooses to answer, instead, figuring his motives are his own, and likely irrelevant to her in the grand scheme. His cooperation is all she's after-- and all he should expect from her in return. ]
You say as long as it leads to a successful exchange, but there is one issue with that. [ A small pause as he sips his tea and tries to gather his thoughts. How is he even supposed to treat this so casually, like they're discussing the weather... ] We have had at least one previous experience with marking off a different square than we had agreed upon, and that leads me to believe there may be a chance it might fail altogether at some point. In that case, I assume you would be willing to not assign fault to either party?
[ Because, look? He tried really hard to aim for "oral fixation" that one time, and he would wouldn't want to be accused of trying to sabotage their deal in any way. The very nature of their agreement might be... about as peculiar as this island, but he still has his honor! ]
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No, I will not blame you for doing your best to fulfill a square and failing.
[ Does she want that to happen? Absolutely not. Is it a problem she has encountered before or heard of someone else encountering? No. The risk seems slim.
And if it does happen she supposes she can hardly blame Dimitri or herself as long as they both tried their best. ]
Although perhaps for more complicated or less obvious squares we should try to educate ourselves before an attempt in order to minimize any risk of that.
[ Just as you would not want to rush into battle with a dull blade you do not want to rush into specific intimate acts without having a solid idea of what they are.
It's entirely at odds with this conversation but she reaches carefully for one of the pastries, willing to use both it and her cup of tea where she can't use her axe and shield. ]
If that sounds fair to you we can compare cards and first look for squares we have in common, or perhaps ones that would be complementary.
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(... what if she is, though? She did very much sit astride his face like it was no skin off her back-- ah, no, better not let his train of thoughts derail down that path.)
So he focuses on what she says next and, oh, it seems they can be like-minded, on occasion. But to think they would agree on this faster than they would on the fate of an entire continent... ]
I do. [ A nod, and he places his cup down again; if they are to compare cards, he will be needing that arm. ] In fact, that is the reason why I asked for a few days before we could meet. I cannot say I knew what several of my own squares entailed, but the library in this place provides... quite the wealth of knowledge.
[ So yes, this is what his preparations meant: studying up on kinks. Did he maybe learn more than absolutely necessary? Possibly. Is he ever going to look at horses the same way again? Absolutely not. But he did what he had to do, so this meeting wouldn't be a waste of time to either of them.
With a deep breath to steel himself, he taps his bracelet a couple of times and leans over, arm reaching across the table so Edelgard can look at the screen, his A5 card on display. It's alarming, really, how he's getting used to this. ]
If there are any squares on my card that you need explained, I should be able to assist.
[ It never feels any less invasive, exposing his card like that, but at least half the squares that have been marked off were Edelgard's doing, so there's little point in feeling embarrassed over those, at least. ]
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A bite of the puff pastry and a swallow of her tea, and then she's mentally braced herself for the necessary practicality of comparing cards with him. She hasn't actually done this before, not a side-by-side comparison. A hint of pink returns to her cheeks as she pulls hers up and rests her arm on the table to offer him a better view of her own card.
She doesn't need to look at what he has already marked off... but she does despite herself. Ultimately she wonders how he ended up with things like cuddling and tickling on his card while she has squares like rimming, anal, begging?
Well. She doesn't envy his coercion square, at least. Frankly, she isn't sure why just being here and doing as asked while kept away from their normal lives doesn't automatically fit the bill. ]
I am uncertain of what "pervertibles" means.
[ And perhaps the mechanical square, within this context, but she has learned that there are accessories that can be used during sex and some may fall under this category. Regardless, she spots a few promising squares. ]
We both have leaving marks. [ And he has certainly done it before. ] As well as endurance and service. [ She pauses, feeling a twinge of self-consciousness as she continues looking for matches. They have more squares in common than she expected, but that will make this easier. ] What have you learned about sensation play?
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(Vaguely, he wonders if one of those other two might have been from their last time. There had certainly been enough rubbing and grinding to meet the requirements, but... what in the worlds is rimming? Something to inquire about later.)
For now, he focuses on the surprising amount of overlap between their tasks, and at how Edelgard expects elaboration as he had offered. He knew it would probably come to this, but now that the prospect of having to do so is imminent... ah. He might need a sip of that tea right about now. ]
That means... introducing household objects into the act. [ If he keeps this as clinical as possible, it should be doable, right? ] It could be a pillow to [ grind ] rub against, or kitchenware like a spatula used to... strike. [ aka spanking, which Edelgard unfortunately has on her card, and he would really rather avoid such violent connotations. ] Apparently, it could even be food.
[ Which... she also has? Wow, he's not trying to imply anything here-- although maybe he should? He wasn't sure what could possibly make for complementary squares but now that they're actually doing drawing comparisons, he's just... naturally coming up with a lot? Where is this even coming from?!
Tea. He needs more of that. And possibly a deep breath or two. He really, really wasn't trained for this. ]
Incidentally, food may also be employed for sensation play. [ He's just going to be over here, an idle stare at his own puff pastry as he actively avoids taking a bite. Would that be too suggestive? Wow, what a mess, he's a mess. ] Ice, to be more precise. To be quite frank, I find it rather puzzling that something so innocuous could be a potential match for so many different squares...
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Oh.
[ Her eyebrows rise. It is admittedly not her most eloquent moment, but she recovers well enough despite the renewed flood of heat in her cheeks. This is an important discussion, if they are to follow through with it. ]
In that case I suppose that your pervertibles square could be paired with quite a few of mine if we get a bit creative.
[ Perhaps even a handle or a hilt used instead of fingers at some point? Thoroughly cleaned before and after. She makes the connection between striking and spanking as well, and she's not sure she likes the idea of Dimitri spanking her. She isn't sure she likes the idea of anyone spanking her, but the square doesn't come with a minimum number of swats required so she could allow someone to do it once... if she doesn't simply do it herself.
Still, she thinks she'll steer him toward other squares first. ]
Since we both have sensation play we could try that together. Or we could try pairing yours with my food square and mine with... your tickling or teasing squares, perhaps?
[ Her blush isn't dying down quickly, but at least the words come a bit more easily now that she's resolutely sinking her teeth into the conversation. ]
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(No, he did not consciously look for that one, and yes, Fate must have laughed at his face when his research led him to that kink in particular. Probably the only time he's ever been glad Edelgard doesn't remember he gave her that dagger.) ]
I suppose trying for something with such a wide range of coverage would maximize our odds for at least one match each. [ But why did it have to be food, though? It's right there on the table, all too suggestive, like somehow he had planned for this outcome! Ugh. ] Since there is a precedent for a different square to be marked off instead, however, it might be best to plan for one combination at a time, then see if we are successful.
[ The alternative is to make a list of all possible complementary squares and invoke the respective clause mid-sex. Annex I, section 3: Domination/Submission, item 2: Begging. Raunchy. ]
On the positive side, I have heard rumors about how aiming for multiple squares at once might net us better rewards. I have not tried it myself-- [ that he knows of yet, because some of us have been too lazy to turn in multikink requests. ] --but keeping our options ample might be a good way to test the hypothesis.
[ Let it be known he is very specifically talking about the gray area that is the combination of food/sensation play/pervertibles, and in no way suggesting they go for entire lines from each of their cards! That would require nothing short of a marathon! Now wouldn't that just be terrible! ]
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A reasonable idea. Since many of these have similar themes and elements that should be simple enough. We can agree on which squares a day or two beforehand if we need time to gather supplies or do more research. [ "Gather supplies." As though they are going on a mission. She doesn't sigh at her wording but she does pause, her gaze returning to his card. ] I am not opposed to trying to achieve rewards for multiple squares at once but I have never seen more than one square at a time marked. You and I have already touched on several that remain unmarked on my card.
[ Improving her quality of life is nice but figuring out what allows her to go home is more important to her, particularly now that she has luxuries that afford her privacy, clean clothes, and effortlessly quick hot baths. ]
As I said, though, so many of these are complementary that it may not take much effort to test the theory. [ Her finger points to the four squares making up her bottom right corner. ] This group seems like it would work well together, for example: begging, messy, endurance, and power play.
[ Again, her eyes dart to him. ]
If you would be willing to beg under these circumstances, that is.
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Thankfully(?) what Edelgard says next captures his attention again, although the realization that comes from that is only... marginally less mortifying. He was only reading her card in terms of potential matches and what else was left to fulfill, but upon second glance, yes, there is an awful lot they have done: leaving marks, oral sex... multiple orgasms. Oh, goodness, how did all of that even happen? And, more importantly--
How can Edelgard be so nonchalant about asking if he would be willing to beg-- not for his life, but for sexual release? What happened to being visibly flustered over this conversation?! ]
Begging. [ He echoes, and that single hooked eyebrow might be the only real expression he has offered for the past few minutes-- pretty sure his soul has ascended and ejected itself from this mortal plane of existence. ] I would have to give it more careful consideration. I might not be downright opposed to it, though it would require a significant level of trust.
[ War context aside, they are still very much new to this as... partners, so it could be something to build with time-- and assuming Edelgard could keep this fair, to begin with. It is quite a lot to ask of your enemy, after all! Which reminds him: ]
For the sake of argument, and in the interest of fairness-- [ A brief pause for tea, an excuse to collect his jumbled thoughts. ] How would you propose we keep that exchange balanced, if I did agree to those specific terms?
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What a shame that he comes up with a question that brings a bit of that pink back to her face. ]
I don't think it would necessarily need to be something that requires trust. [ Her tone stays even. ] If coupled with a dominance and submission square or bondage... then yes, I agree that it may require more trust. However, begging could also be treated a bit like a challenge, couldn't it? A verbal agreement not to touch yourself while I take my time with you, as opposed to physical restraints.
[ Significantly less trust required.
This is not a conversation she ever could have imagined herself having with someone. She picks up her cup again, using the time it takes her to lift it to her lips and sip her tea as an opportunity to gather her thoughts. ]
Obviously we would agree that either of us can put a stop to it at any time, just as we have agreed to similar terms for the general agreement. I would want to consider it further but it's possible that our fair exchange could extend to these particular squares as well. In the interest of balance there is the possibility of trading roles. We both have dominance and submission squares. We both have service. You have leashes and collars; I have bondage and power play. If you are at my mercy for one square I may be willing to let you take the reins for a different square. Would that be enough balance, in your opinion?
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Well. Several moons ago, he would have thrived in the prospect of having her at his mercy, her graceful neck gripped in one hand, squeezing every last breath out of her until bone snapped-- and, oh, how did it arouse him. For countless nights, he would pleasure himself to thoughts of a different scenario-- chasing her off the battlefield and drilling her into the ground as she pleaded for her life, fucking her mouth to shut her screams, it didn't matter. It all culminated in death for her, and release for him. But now, and as much as he has come to accept that beast will always be a part of him... it shames him, deeply so.
And yet, it all seems so inconsequential to Edelgard-- the same Edelgard who was told to choose how he should kill her, in richness of detail. He wouldn't expect her to fear him, but... does she truly have no reservations about relinquishing control to him, of all people? ]
You seem rather secure in your ability to handle it.
[ That resolute self-assurance, the strength to march onward without ever looking back, all the qualities she displays with ease and that he lacks... Yes, this would definitely require considerable trust-- in himself, if nothing else.
(Even now, he must rise to meet her, still.) ]
I do suppose that would ensure a balanced exchange, though. [ The twinge of sadness from before is gone from his voice, now more collected, her eyes under blue scrutiny. He's not backing down from his decision. ] However, since you also would rather consider this further, I propose we start elsewhere, as we grow more acquainted with the idea.
[ And since they have oh so drastically moved on from the topic of incorporating food into less than innocent contexts, he will take this brief lull to finally reach for his puff pastry, bringing it up to his lips. It stays untouched for a second longer, as he only bites into it after another question: ]
I presume you must be familiar with the concept of safe words, as well?
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I am just as capable of handling you in this as I am in battle.
[ For him to believe anything else would be offensive.
All along she has expected him to be hostile, but if he wanted to harm her he has had ample opportunity, moments where they were unarmed and unarmored and entangled. Based on his behavior here -- and his behavior when they were students -- she would not be surprised to have him tell her their truce is over before taking an action that would end it.
What can he possibly think he would be doing to her if she agreed to take a less dominant role? Perhaps... she should go to the library later, to address lingering questions. ]
But I do not disagree. There are easier and more appropriate squares we can work through.
[ Even after her attention returns to her cup she can feel the weight of his eyes. To say she is glad for a moment's break is an understatement and one she has no intention of admitting to him, but his question takes her by surprise. She takes a generous drink of her tea before she answers. ]
Safe words?
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And considering her following question, he's really starting to feel she doesn't even know much about her own squares. At least she asks instead of pretending to be in control, as she might have done, once; he'll call that progress. ]
Safe words. [ He repeats, with a hard swallow of his pastry. ] They are used in a domination and submission context, as a means to safeguard the submissive partner. Since there can be elements of pain, physical restraints or even dubious consent-- [ and he's not even going into downright non-con and rape fantasies because thankfully it's not a square for either of them, and because the thought still disturbs him far too much for words. ] --these words come into play as an indisputable warning, or a call to cease the act immediately.
[ There, a very clinical relaying of his thorough studies. Annette would be proud, though personally, Dimitri feels like his skin is about to melt and leave his bones exposed, anytime now; even the sip of tea he intakes feels chilly in comparison. ]
Given the nature of our agreement, it might be wise to establish them early on. Naturally, telling me to stop at any time would be enough under any circumstance, but if there is a possibility we might attempt that particular set of squares at a later point, then we could consider this training.
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When I spoke to a few people of the difference between domination and power play before, safe words were not mentioned.
[ It's an explanation, of sorts. She is not clueless about this, but... she obviously does not know as much as she thought and the return trip to the library begins to seem more necessary by the moment. And somehow Dimitri of the Arched Brow manages to recite all this as though he has practiced the explanation. Perhaps he has.
Could she be accused of holding her tea a bit like a shield again right now? Yes. ]
It was suggested to me that power play specifically emphasizes an imbalanced dynamic of power between partners and may involve playacting. If either of us is to play a role of some kind -- a more coerced role, specifically -- then I suppose I see the value of agreeing on key words ahead of time. When I am simply Edelgard, however, I think the word "stop" should be instructive enough, don't you?
[ She can't imagine saying that and not meaning it, especially within this context. ]
If we do attempt these more complicated squares then I think it would be wise for us to both agree on any... accessories used or acts that may be done ahead of time. As an example, I am unwilling to be bound. If you decide to assist me with my bondage square, you will need to be bound.
[ The slightest hesitation. ]
For someone of your effortless strength that may not be an issue at all.
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I find it hard to believe someone of your strength would have an issue with light binding. [ His tone is still measured even as his fingers drum on the handle of his cup, eyes still fixed on hers. ] A silken scarf could be employed for both, bondage and sensation play, for instance.
[ He can respect that if it's a personal preference or boundary, but he is not too fond of the implication he should yield to her every whim simply because of his unnatural physical prowess. ]
However, if you do not feel comfortable with the thought of being restrained, then I have no intention of imposing on you. Likewise, if you do not wish to rehearse the use of safe words in advance, we shall only agree on those when and if we do decide to tackle those squares; in the meantime, a simple "stop" should more than suffice.
[ Another sip of tea, and the cup lingers before his lips for a moment longer, a shield of his own. ]
If I do agree to being bound, though, then you must agree to not bring any weapons. Concealed or otherwise.
[ While they're talking of comfort levels, this should be reasonable enough, considering their usual standing. And yes, that includes the dagger he knows oh so well; we don't want any accidental knife play in the bedroom, now do we? ]
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But she will not bend on this and she's about to say as much when he continues. Fortunately, he doesn't actually protest her opinion... and she reminds herself that it is fine for them to disagree on things here. Within this conversation disagreeing on something means finding a different solution that they can agree on. It doesn't render the entire proposal pointless.
Not until it does.
And even if it did, it would not take much to convince herself that it is for the best. ]
I assume you are recalling my dagger. [ She shakes her head slightly. ] Do you truly think it fair to expect me to come to where you live -- where your weapons are housed -- without one of my own? If you agree to be bound, I will agree to disarm ahead of time. I will let you watch as I set my weapon aside. If you prefer, I could even tuck it inside one of your drawers until we have finished.
[ She is not unwilling to compromise. ]
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Right you are. [ His eyes drop to the teacup in his hand, and this may be the first time during this conversation that he avoids her gaze on purpose. ] I should not ask you to part with it.
[ Not the dagger-- not the one he gave her, the one she's kept all these years, always on her person. That would be unfair to the both of them.
He fills the lingering silence with a bite of his pastry, ruminating on his meal and his feelings. With any luck, Edelgard will take it only as a pause to consider the compromise and nothing else. ]
If we do go through with it, you can leave your weapon with the rest of mine, and this way you will also know where I keep them. [ A show of good faith, in a way.] Would you find that acceptable?
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I would accept that. And I apologize if I was wrong in my assumption that you would be willing to continue to meet here. If hosting makes you uneasy we should scout for a location where neither of us is expected. I am willing to do that at any time as well.
[ Another pause, shorter. She helps herself to her last bite of pastry. ]
Are there other terms you would like to discuss?
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There is no need to apologize. My lodgings were suitable enough for this meeting, and if you are not opposed to coming over more regularly, then we may continue to use it for privacy. As for further discussions...
[ Hmm. Maybe they should agree to stop apologizing so much, for starters? Although he supposes having this agreement would effectively eliminate the need for... a good number of the reasons that have driven either of them to apologize, so far. ]
Aside from being bound, is there anything else you would rather not have included in our future meetings?
[ He doesn't expect an extensive list off the top of her head, of course, but maybe something like... guidelines? Or just any other hard nos she can think of, really. ]
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I have not disliked anything we have done together.
[ While it warms her cheeks again to say it, this seems like the most basic and informative starting point. He was there: he has memories of what they did and did not do. ]
Being bound or otherwise incapacitated is the primary thing I would like to avoid. I haven't looked at many other cards, but I know there are at least a few possible acts that are much more sadistic than what I see on either of ours. I would not wish to burn you or cause long-term physical scarring and I would prefer to be treated with the same courtesy.
[ Is there a type of intimacy in it? Yes. Are her torturous childhood memories something she wants to combine with sex? No.
No.
How dry her mouth feels! She takes yet another sip of tea and notices that she has nearly finished it. ]
And you?
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The same applies to myself, as well. Considering we share a square for marking, I can endure light scarring and even minor bleeding. [ Like the scratch of her nails, though he's not going to say that out loud. ] However, burns are something I would especially like to steer clear from.
[ She might have even spotted the larger burn scars on his back by now, and though they do carry a meaning he is proud to bear-- the memory that he has saved someone-- he would rather not associate any sexual acts to the tragedy that took so many loved ones from him. ]
As for what we have done before--
[ His own cup is still halfway down, but he notices Edelgard has almost run out of tea, so he reaches for the pot and leans over across the table to pour her some more. ]
Is there anything you would like to have included again in our meetings?
[ It's good hospitality and all, but perhaps he should've timed his question just a little better, instead of asking from this up and close, steam rising between them. ]
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And then finds herself wondering if he's looked at himself in the mirror and examined the marks she left on him just as she has with her own mirror. Little dark splotches standing out on her skin, evidence of the path his mouth took. A reminder of what they have done.
As long as they continue this discussion it should not surprise her if her mind wanders to related incidents a bit, should it? It's almost a good thing that he leans over the table toward her to refill her cup, and the thought that he may be rising to kiss her is chased from her mind as quickly as it appears.
If she could will the heat out of her cheeks she certainly would. Part of her is startled by the question, and part of her thinks it just as reasonable as the last. They want it to be pleasurable intimacy. If nothing else, feeling good should help put them at ease.
Still, he monopolizes her attention entirely until he straightens. The way his hair falls forward when he leans, the laces at the front of his shirt, the pale gold sweep of his eyelashes. She barely even blinks. ]
I have enjoyed being licked. [ She has to quickly decide how far she is willing to go with this, and even though she expects her fair complexion to glow with heat she takes it the step further. He asked, and she is answering. ] I enjoyed having you in my mouth while your own was on me.
[ Does she go on to say that in the interest of fairness she would be willing to pleasure him orally until he reaches climax, whether or not he happens to be licking her at the time? Perhaps she'll sit on that particular thought until they are actually working on squares rather than sitting at a table and talking. There may not even be a need to speak of it before trying it. ]
Is there something you feel similarly about?
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